Abstract
It was a hot summer day, and my sister-in-law and I had decided to mix things up and take a short road trip over the mountain with my three and her two littles to a nearby town in the valley with a great park for children. Instead of our usual city playground choices, this park was built around a quaint river, with a fun bridge to run and jump on and families of ducks that liked nothing more than to have little hands toss treats into the water for them to retrieve. It was a win-win situation!
Just before the kids stopped enjoying what the park had to offer and just in time before the snacks wore off and the “hangry” set in, we decided to grab some lunch at a popular café. Everyone else had the same idea, but despite the crowds, we were able to snag a spot on some loveseats around a little coffee table near the back. We ordered gourmet sandwiches for us, and probably something like PB&J's for the kids, and sipped our iced coffee while we waited for the food. The kids bounced around us on the cushions giggling and chanting little rhymes with “their inside voices.”
My youngest was about 4 months old at the time, and was ready for his lunch, which meant he was ready to breastfeed. As a pediatrician, it had always been my goal to be a role model and practice what I preach with regard to breastfeeding anywhere and everywhere that my children needed to, without shame and as if it were completely normal (since it should be!) Although I had heard of friends and other mothers encountering trouble, some incidents even making the news, it had never happened to me, and over the years, I had become quite comfortable with breastfeeding in public. This day was no exception, so I started feeding him as I normally would not thinking anything of it.
The loveseat that I was sitting on faced the rest of the tables, and I started noticing that a man, probably in his early 60s and seated three tables away, kept looking over. He was immersed in what must have been a serious conversation as his expression was flat, and I could see his lips moving even as he looked over. Periodically he would lean in even more as if to make a point to the person across from him. I imagined that perhaps he was telling his companion about what he was observing—that is, me breastfeeding my child.
The food came, and we all delightedly dug in—me with one hand as I continued feeding my son—the experienced expert multitasking mom. Preoccupied with getting us all fed, I stopped looking over as much, but when I finally did again—there he was—still looking! Not only that, but oh my goodness, he was standing up… still looking at me, and maybe… wait—is he heading over toward me? I braced myself and quickly reviewed in my head how I would counter whatever he was about to say. “If you don't like what you are seeing, then please don't look.” “Or, actually women have a right to breastfeed their baby anywhere they are legally allowed to be.” “Or, get a life!”
He did, indeed come over to me, but what he said to me was quite a surprise. He said with a smile on his face, “I love that you are breastfeeding your baby here in this café, and wanted to let you know that my wife is a La Leche League leader for this whole area, and she would be so happy!” Wow! I was floored and flooded with a sense of being surrounded by support. This is how it should be. We are all part of the village and wouldn't it be wonderful if that village celebrated breastfeeding! Perhaps this should be all of our New Year's resolution!
Happy New Year from the Academy of Breastfeeding Medicine, and may we keep supporting new families to breastfeed for healthier lives worldwide.