Experiences of middle-class fathers of children with autism spectrum disorders in the context of hegemonic masculinity: The case of Turkey

Abstract

This study aims to reveal the paternal perception and experiences of middle-class fathers of children with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) in the context of hegemonic masculinity and gender. The research design is based on a phenomenological approach with a qualitative research pattern; thus, the participants, comprising 18 fathers of children with ASD, were reached through the purposive sampling method. Analysis results pointed to the following themes: ‘Fathers’ feelings on the basis of masculinity’, ‘Imagined–actual fatherhood’, and ‘Work–family–life balance’. The findings indicated that fathers of children with ASD had their fatherhood patterns changed toward nurturant fatherhood. Being an educated and professional member of the middle class, being dual-earner parents, and having a child with autism are effective in this transformation. Suggestions are made as to social policy and feminist social work practices for the development of nurturant fatherhood and egalitarian gender relations.

Keywords

Fatherhood fathers of children with autism feminist social work gender hegemonic masculinity Turkey

Introduction

Autism spectrum disorder (ASD) is a neurodevelopmental disorder that occurs in early childhood and lasts a lifetime, manifests with difficulties in social interaction and communication, and causes delays in behavioral and cognitive development (American Psychological Association [APA], 2021). It is estimated that approximately one in 160 children worldwide has ASD (World Health Organization [WHO], 2021). The characteristics of children with ASD lead to changes in the lives of the parents, increasing their roles and responsibilities. Studies with mothers of children with ASD are more common than studies with fathers (Frye, 2015).

In the literature, doing research with fathers is described as difficult by researchers (Carpenter, 2002) and terms such as ‘hard to reach’ (McConkey, 1994), ‘invisible parent’ (Ballard, 1994), and ‘peripheral parent’ (Herbert and Carpenter, 1994) have been coined. Therefore, for a long time, no research has been conducted with fathers. The initial research on fathers of children with ASD started in the 1990s (MacDonald and Hastings, 2010). Today, a number of studies on fathers of children with ASD are available in the literature. Quantitative research on ASD and father involvement (Habib, 2012; Hay, 2016; Potter, 2017), and qualitative research focusing on the experiences of fathers on being a father and fatherhood practices (Burrell et al., 2017; Frye, 2014; Hobson and Noyes, 2011; Honig, 2008; Prasad, 2015; Schrader, 2013) are available in the literature.

In his research with 12 fathers of children with ASD, Prasad (2015) concluded that having a child with ASD has a significant influence on the fatherhood experiences of many fathers. Research results revealed that after the diagnosis of their children fathers felt guilty; they turned to spirituality to cope, and they felt unsuccessful. Besides, fathers couldn’t practice their fatherhood dreams and were worried about the future of their children. Research results further denoted that fathers have difficulties to relate and communicate with their children; thus, bearing a protective role. In his doctoral thesis on experiences of fathers of children with ASD Schrader (2013) indicated that due to uncertainties during the diagnosis process fathers experience financial difficulties as well as living a stressful life filled with disappointments. The role of fathers as a provider limits the time spent with children, limits the time to care for their child; thus paving the path for the mother to become the primary caregiver. The abovementioned studies focus on the negative experiences and needs of fathers.

In the literature, studies focusing on the positive experiences of fathers of children with ASD are also available (Kayfitz et al., 2010; Potter, 2016; Thackeray and Eatough, 2016). In his quantitative study with 198 fathers of children with ASD, Potter (2016) stated that acknowledging the strengths and personal characteristics of the children, and establishing loving and rewarding relationships with them created satisfaction in fatherhood roles. As a result of research conducted with 23 parents of school-age children, Kayfitz et al. (2010) suggested that lower parental stress leads to positive experiences. In their research with five fathers of young adults with developmental disabilities, Thackeray and Eatough (2016) concluded those children to be a source of elation.

Fathers of children with ASD try to suppress their negative emotions, whereas mothers express their feelings tangibly (Gray, 2003; Keller and Honig, 2004; MacDonald and Hastings, 2010; Pelchat et al., 2009). Although both parents individually feel guilty, fathers personally develop a sense of failure (Ahmad and Dardas, 2015; Pelchat et al., 2009), such that it is reflected in the social support received by the mother and father. Carpenter and Towers (2008) indicate that compared with mothers, fathers’ social support needs are neglected; and compared with their wives, fathers receive less social support. Sometimes fathers may abstain from seeking help from other people and may feel uncomfortable talking about the child’s disability with their colleagues (Pelchat et al., 2009). Approaching the situation from the perspective of gender and coping recalls Connell’s (1987) concept of hegemonic masculinity.

Masculinity is a sociocultural construct that can be learned and whose boundaries can change over time (Beynon, 2011). Hegemonic masculinity (Connell, 1987) centers on power relations and hierarchically denotes the highest position against other masculinities depending on the masculinity values prevailing in a society. Hegemonic masculinity is associated with a regular income-generating job and has a central role in the formation of male identity. He who ‘is not a jobholder’ and ‘is not a breadwinner’ may have a crisis in building his masculinity (Barutçu, 2013; Brandth and Kvande, 1998). Evidently, masculinity and fatherhood are interwoven. Therefore, the sociocultural context in which masculinity and fatherhood are mutually constructed should be considered when discussing paternity (Enderstein and Boonzaier, 2015). According to studies conducted in Turkey, the traditionally expressed masculinity involves passing through the stages of circumcision, military service, finding a job, marriage and paternity. Paternity is a status deserved only by the male individual who is circumcised, fulfills his military service, finds a job and has heterosexual sexual experience (Bolak Boratav et al., 2017; Sancar, 2016; Selek, 2014).

In the fatherhood literature, analyzing fatherhood studies reveals that fatherhood roles have changed within the historical process. Fatherhood has transformed from being a moral guide to a new fatherhood role, in which fathers are more nurturant. The nurturant father represents the father figure who takes care of children and housework, and provides emotional support to his wife (Cabrera et al., 2000; Lamb, 2000; Peters and Day, 2012). Several studies indicate that in Turkey, the masculinity values transferred from father to son also experienced a rupture (Barutçu and Hıdır, 2016; Beşpınar, 2015; Bolak Boratav et al., 2017; Bozok, 2018a, 2018b; Sancar, 2016; Tol and Taşkan, 2018; Topçu, 2016). In Turkey, although there are a number of studies focusing on mothers of children with ASD (Bıçak, 2009; Töret et al., 2014; Üstüner Top, 2009), there are no studies demonstrating the fatherhood experiences of fathers of children with ASD. Besides, although various studies are available in the international literature that addresses the experiences of fathers of children with ASD, these lack the necessary evaluations on the basis of hegemonic masculinity and gender. However, it is the society that teaches fatherhood to its subjects; thus, it is shaped by gender role patterns. Thackeray and Eatough (2016) state that fatherhood is influenced by social understandings on masculinity and fatherhood, yet these are the key to understanding fathers’ experience. Indeed, the fact that men do not seek social support and cannot express their feelings – as indicated in the abovementioned studies – points to the need to carry out research based on gender and masculinity to understand the fatherhood experiences of fathers of children with ASD.

The aim of feminist social work is to ensure gender equality by questioning patriarchy and existing power inequalities. The collapse of patriarchy will not be accomplished by focusing solely on women’s experiences (Schully, 1990). Therefore, the social construction of masculinity should be critically tackled (Cree and Cavanagh, 1996; Dominelli, 2002), but there are very few studies on fatherhood in the social work literature (Strug and Wilmore-Schaeffer, 2003). Men and their problems are not adequately addressed in the social work literature or in social work practices (Cree and Cavanagh, 1996; Pease, 2011). As a response to this gap, the main aim of this research is to focus on analyzing fathers’ perceptions and experiences of fathers of children with ASD, on the basis of hegemonic masculinity and gender.

Based on interviews with fathers with ASD, the following questions are discussed:

How do men feel after their child is diagnosed with ASD?

How do fathers describe fatherhood?

How does the working life of fathers affect their fatherhood experiences?

Method

This is a qualitative research study that focuses on the individual experiences of 18 fathers of children with ASD to figure out the experiences in their masculinity and fatherhood. In this research, a phenomenological approach was adopted, and the experiences of fathers were dealt with in light of their approach to and interpretation of the world they live in, in line with their own reality (Creswell, 2013).

Participants

This study adopted a purposive sampling method based on the phenomenological approach (Creswell, 2013). One of the participation criteria was to have a child with ASD, aged 5 and over. This age range was chosen because it is difficult to diagnose autism before the age of 3, based on the available information in the literature. However, field practice revealed the possibility to make a diagnosis before the age of 2. Therefore, fathers of 2-year-olds with autism diagnosis, who volunteered, were also included in the research. The other participation criterion was co-residing with their children. Co-residing with their children was identified as a criterion to highlight the gender relations in the domestic setting. Accordingly, in-depth interviews were carried out with a total of 18 fathers in Ankara, between April and December 2018. All interviews were conducted by the first author. The age of participants ranged between 28 and 57 years. While four fathers had completed high school, two fathers had doctoral degrees and twelve participants had bachelor degrees. A majority of the fathers (12) had one child. Out of all the fathers, only one father had three children. Five fathers had two children.

The Autism Foundation in Ankara was contacted to reach the participants. However, only one father was interviewed through the Autism Foundation. Since the Autism Foundation did not provide the necessary support, a special education and rehabilitation center was established through personal contacts, and volunteer fathers who met the sampling criteria were included in the research process. The director and the psychologist working in the private education and rehabilitation center provided support to access the participants. They provided a list of the fathers who met the criteria, together with their visiting dates and times.

We used face to face in-depth interview and observation techniques in this study. Initially, questions in the literature were used in a semi-structured interview guide; then, questions addressing masculinity, disability and fatherhood were added after a number of interviews were carried out in the field. Socio-demographic questions were presented in the first part of the semi-structured interview form, and questions related to ‘Child with ASD and Fatherhood’ were presented in the second part. In the interview guide, 16 questions were included about fathers’ feelings after learning that their children have ASD, how they experience fatherhood, and whether they can balance work–family life. With the consent of the participants, a recorder was used during the interviews. The physical environment in the field, the interview process and the actions of the participants (body language, facial expressions and gestures, pauses during the interview) were recorded in a notebook in order to interpret the data. These notes were effective in interpreting the participants’ perceptions of masculinity and paternity.

As a female researcher, I faced some difficulties interviewing men. Particularly during my first interviews in which I asked questions examining the relationship between masculinity and paternity, I had concerns that men would think that I was judging them. However, the answers they gave to the questions ‘What are your reviews on the interview process?’ and ‘How do you feel after the interview?’ asked at the end of the interview demonstrated that I was successful in adopting a non-judgmental attitude, and made me feel relieved. They stated that they were able to share their feelings that they had not shared with anyone before, and that they were emotionally relieved. I think that my younger age compared with the fathers was influential in this result. Nevertheless, our similar class characteristics facilitated the interview process.

Interviews were held in different places such as workplace (6), cafe (6), or the special education and rehabilitation center (6) in line with the available days and time of the fathers. It was observed that there were mostly mothers in the special education and rehabilitation centers and they shared the health status of their children with other mothers. Each interview with fathers lasted approximately 2 hours. As a result of the repetition of similar statements, the researchers decided that the data had reached saturation, and the data collection process was terminated.

Data analysis

The thematic analysis described by Braun and Clarke (2006), which is most commonly used in qualitative research analysis, was used to analyze the data in this research. This analysis included six steps: Familiarizing yourself with your data, generating initial codes, searching for themes, reviewing themes, defining and naming themes, and generating the report. Prior to analysis, we transcribed interviews and read thoroughly. Transcripts were in Turkish and translated to English for this article. Due care was taken to create transcripts immediately after the interviews; line-by-line open coding was performed on the transcript outputs of the first three interviews in conformity with the purpose of the research. After coding of the first few interviews, the themes emerged. Deciphered records were repeatedly reviewed on the basis of these emerging themes. Transcripts of all interviews were read for multiple times. As a result of the intensive process of open coding, a total of 950 codes were obtained. The codes were revised in line with the terminological concepts in the literature and the purposes of the research. Codes were then developed into overarching themes, categories, and subcategories by using MAXQDA18. The themes were clearly defined and named to reflect the content. Three themes and fourteen categories emerged regarding the experiences of fathers with children with ASD. The themes included fathers’ feelings on the basis of masculinity, imagined and actual fatherhood, and work–family–life balance. Finally, three different people analyzed the accuracy of the research outcomes, and validation was ensured through external audits (Creswell, 2013; Miles and Huberman, 1994).

Ethical considerations

To receive ethical approval, Hacettepe University Ethics Committee was consulted. Prior to starting the interviews, each father was provided with an informed consent form, and that the results of the research would be presented in line with the principles of anonymity and confidentiality. Participating fathers’ approval was sought before using a recorder. We used pseudonyms for the confidentiality of the participants.

Results

Three themes emerged as a result of the analysis: ‘Fathers’ feelings on the basis of masculinity’, ‘Imagined-actual fatherhood’ and ‘Work-Family-Life Balance’.

Fathers’ feelings on the basis of masculinity

After having a child diagnosed with ASD, realizing that the family dreams cannot be fulfilled may cause various emotional reactions (Akbey and Kalaycı, 2016). However, women and men experience this emotional process differently (Gray, 2003; Thoits, 1995), as the dominant culture in and discourses of the society are aimed at building strong and rational masculinities that do not suffer. Therefore, we asked the participants about how they felt in this process to understand their feelings, whether they could express these feelings, and whether they shared this situation with anyone. Most fathers answered that rather than focusing on their feelings, when they were informed of the situation initially they did their own research on autism as they had no idea about it; and once they found out they were devastated, and unable to fit their children in the picture. Still, we posed more detailed questions to understand their feelings and the process they went through, on the basis of masculinity. Because of the emotional sensitivity of their spouses, they tried to remain strong, to protect the rational male identity, and experienced their emotions when they were alone:

Actually, we didn’t show our feelings. Neither did I. You know the men repress their feelings. We are not like the ladies. (Berk, 40 years old)

Men avoid being seen as sensitive or emotional due to gender norms that restrain being emotional. In their research on fathers of children with neurodevelopmental disorder, Jackson and Andipatin (2019) found that the fathers experience a sense of ‘destruction’; however, they cannot reveal this emotion as they are men. As of childhood, men are raised to suppress expressing their feelings (Jakupcak et al., 2005). The emotions hidden in the statements of some fathers brought such an awareness to the forefront. In addition, military service is significant in constructing a hegemonic masculine identity (Hinojosa, 2010). Berk, who has a boy with ASD, stated that

Since boys are raised in such a way, we do not like to look weak from the outside. In general, that is the way men are . . . You know we both have this and the military service. (Berk, 40 years old)

The men’s attempts to not show their feelings due to the masculinity codes prevailing in the society caused them not to share the negative situations and what they are going through with anyone, and buried them in ‘silence’. Barış stated that he even did not share this situation with his family. Sedat admitted that after his son was diagnosed, he did not mention this situation to anyone for a long time, and tried to keep his feelings to himself.

During the socialization of masculinity, some fathers who internalize their feelings by learning not to express them paid the cost of masculinity (Messner, 1997) in various ways. Being unable to show their feelings caused the participants to face health problems in the future. Mert suffered from psoriasis, which was exacerbated after his son was diagnosed. Sedat stated that he had a stroke three years ago, in his own words:

. . . In such cases, they usually say that people go through five stages. Rejection, denial, blame, shock. Then acceptance. After acceptance, either you continue, or you run or leave. Leave yourself to your fate. I skipped the first stage directly. And went through the fourth one, but then I had experienced the side effects of doing so. I even had a stroke three years ago, which was completely psychological. (Sedat, 48 years old)

Women and men have a different use of networks; thus women use social support more than men (Salas et al., 2017). This is reflected in the subjects discussed by fathers of children with ASD when they come together. Ferhat stated that he does not meet regularly with other fathers who have children with ASD; and even if and when they do meet up, due to their differentiating features they do not tend to share too much with one another. However, Aras, Ali and Sedat stated that when they meet with other fathers, they avoid talking about their children, and assume these meetings are a means to get rid of emotional baggage and to relax.

Most of the participants stated that they did not share the situation with their close friends, and that they express their feelings when they are alone. This situation points to the socialization process of masculinity, built on the basis of dominant discourses. Men build their masculinity based on hiding emotions, and being strong. However, trying to be strong all the time causes men to pay a price.

Aubert-Godard and Scalles (2004) state that the disability of the child is a representation of the failure of the male identity, which is also related to a narcissistic wound (as cited in Pelchat et al., 2009). In other words, hegemonic masculinity refers to having a strong and robust body. The inability of the body to fulfill its function leads to fragility of men’s perceptions of ego and self (Connell, 1987, 2005). Yet, narratives of the participants revealed that the situation is, in fact, to the contrary. Fathers with high awareness and parental responsibility, who defined paternity roles of the participating fathers as ‘securing the child’s future, caring for and protecting the child’, were influential in this result. Therefore, the participants did not state feelings of failure, but based on their own value system they stated that they would never leave their children:

I have never had it. Both the way I was raised in the family and my personality does not let me run away. When I think of my son, my eyes are filled with tears. My son is everything to me. The number of days I spent away from Mehmet in the last nineteen years does not exceed a total of two months. (Sedat, 48 years old)

Being the father of a disabled child may bring additional pressure to an already demanding role (Ahmad and Dardas, 2015). Men having children with disabilities may leave their families behind (Aykara, 2015). Ferhat, Ali and Serkan listed the reasons for men to leave their children with ASD as: the process bearing too much responsibility, the process being too hard and that men would not want to undertake this responsibility. However, in line with the traditional gender roles, Sedat underlined the income-generating role of the male and the increased financial responsibilities to be the reason for men escaping.

Stating that there was discord between his parents during his childhood and that his mother had to leave him and his brother, Mehmet stated that the reason for a father leaving might be due to impossibility and despair.

The process of fathers to accept a disabled child could be turbulent and prolonged (Hornby, 1992). Acceptance of ASD is a complex process involving emotional ups and downs. Due to the masculinity norms prevailing in society, fathers initially struggled to acknowledge their child’s situation, but over time they managed to accept it. In addition, emphasizing their value systems the participants stated that they would never leave their children. They believed the reasons for men leaving their children were their inability to embrace the situation, wanting to escape from responsibilities and out of despair. The narratives of the participating fathers suggest that their perceptions of paternal responsibilities overtake their perceptions of masculinity, which become fragile.

Imagined–actual fatherhood

Having a disabled child initiates a different type of fatherhood narrative (Ahmad and Dardas, 2015; Jackson and Andipatin, 2019). Although the participants showed ‘nurturant father’ characteristics, they experienced fatherhood differently than fathers with neurotypical children. It turned out that the fatherhood experiences of the participants and their involvement were shaped and varied in line with the needs of their children. Failure to communicate with their children as they desire, and failure to establish emotional intimacy saddened them, believing that they cannot realize their fatherhood. Although it is not a problem for the traditional father to not be able to establish a close connection with their child, it may pose a problem for the nurturant father. The ableist perspective within the dominant paternity ideology causes fathers to focus on the negativities and failures in their relations with the disabled child and to convey their experiences accordingly. This demonstrates that fathers experience the pressures of both patriarchal and ableist ideology.

The participants expressed their fatherhood experiences on things they would want to but cannot fulfill with their children. Research results revealed that the imagined fatherhood for most fathers is where they can establish relationships based on love and respect, raise them according to their own values, and share time with their children.

The pressure created by the ableist ideology on fathers constitutes an obstacle in their relations with their children. The inability of children to establish emotional intimacy with their fathers caused deep sorrow, believing that they cannot ‘live’ their fatherhood to the full:

Not being unable to realize my role as a father with my daughter is devastating for me. (Talat, 38 years old)

Talat and Mavi have little children. Although they are willing to play games and take them out, they are not able to do so. Sedat, whose son is 19 years old, stated the things he is not able to do with his child:

My son is unable to steal and drive my car. He cannot. (Sad.) I wish he would be able to do such a thing. My son is not able to tell me that he has a girlfriend. He doesn’t have a girlfriend. If it was possible, I would make it happen. (Sedat, 48 years old)

The participants’ descriptions of their desired fatherhood were of a sharing father who establishes closer relationships. However, the participants were not able to become the fathers they would have intended to be, and took the most appropriate fatherhood role in line with their children’s needs. For example, Serkan stated that he wants to establish a close relationship with his child by pointing to a ‘father like a friend’, but his relationship with his child has turned into a dependent relationship with the increased care and attention.

The participants stated that their fatherhood style is more protective, preventive and responsibility-bearing. For example, Ismail, who has two children with ASD, stated that the core of the fatherhood role is protecting and preventing the children from any possible harm. However, Suat indicated that his fatherhood style was on the basis of control-based responsibility: ‘A preventive fatherhood, protective fatherhood . . . Mine is more of preventive fatherhood’. Implying that the relationship with his own father was based on pressure and authority, Bulut desired to become a father ensuring more free space for his child. However, he could not manage to because of the special needs of his child; on the contrary, he became a restrictive father and bore a protective role. In addition, the increased responsibility and the child’s need for attention and care caused difficulties in the fatherhood experiences of the participating fathers.

Having a disabled child may bring changes in fatherhood behavior (Bonsall, 2018). The results of this research also revealed that fatherhood behaviors are transformed. Some of the fathers with two children stated that they became more patient and caring, and their angry and authoritarian behaviors decreased after their younger child was diagnosed with ASD.

Fathers of children with ASD experience various changes such as personal development, developing patience, becoming more tolerant, understanding difficulties and becoming more responsible as a parent (Isenhour, 2010). Narratives of the participants also reflected these changes. Mehmet and Ahmet indicated that the father–child relationship changed positively, and that they spent more time with their children and became more concerned and devoted:

I formed deeper bonds with my child. I cannot imagine how I used to look after my child. We were leaving him in front of the television; we were leaving him alone with the tablet, with the phone; we were not taking care. But after this, we went back to being a mother and father again. (Mehmet, 28 years old)

The participants’ narratives showed that fathers experienced a transformation in fatherhood with the diagnosis of ASD, and their behavior toward their children changed positively. The special needs of the child, the need for more attention and care, influenced this situation.

Work–family–life balance

Men work overtime and have more work if and when they have children in need of care. For women, it is the opposite (Segal, 1990; Towers and Swift, 2006). Traditional gender roles may cause men to bear the role of breadwinning, and take on more responsibility. Thus, caretaking is associated with the role of women; they leave their jobs to assume the role of caregivers. Some fathers expressed that their spouses left work because of the special needs of their children. Ali stated that his wife, who is an English teacher, stopped working after his child was diagnosed:

Right now, my wife is not working because of Murat’s condition. It is a mandate. Someone has to cope with this. And it is not an easy process. (Ali, 43 years old)

Although the participants thought that they could partially balance their work and family lives, they occasionally stated that they had insufficient spare time for their children due to their work intensity. In addition, fathers who are single-earner parents stated that they were stressed due to their financial responsibilities:

I am very intense and stressed out. Yağız’s special education is one of the sources of stress. It is a serious expense for me. (Bulut, 49 years old)

Being a single-earner parent in the household increased the responsibilities of the participants as breadwinners. The fathers who are single-earner parents participated in domestic work to a more limited extent. Thus, gender-based inequality is strengthened in these families:

Well, it doesn’t matter men or women, the hard work to be done at home is my duty. Food, dishes, laundry is my wife’s duty, okay? (Ismail, 52 years old)

Besides, the fact of the man being a single-earner parent caused him to assume the woman to be responsible for housework, and not willing to do housework that seems feminine:

Well sometimes if I do too much housework, I feel like a henpecked man, as they say, in society, a man who is submissive or dependent on his wife. (Berk, 40 years old)

Participants who are dual-earner parents stated that there is no distinction between women and men. For example, Aras challenged hegemonic masculinity norms; in his own words:

Of course the man has responsibility in the house, if he is married, if he is sharing a home he must bear responsibilities. But in general, the way of the Turkish man is . . . He sits down, and asks if the meal is ready? If his blue shirt is ironed? What happens if your blue shirt is not ironed? I think nothing happen . . . Everyone gets tired. My wife works also, I work also. We work together when we come home. (Aras, 57 years old)

Although the participants stated that they contributed to housework, which is assumed to be a women’s job more than that of fathers’, this was far from being a ‘communion’. When they are the single-earner parent, fathers’ identity as the working male comes to the fore. Although most of the participants take roles and responsibilities in the household, it was a secondary role as ‘helping’; which is in line with Segal’s (1990) statement. Men may tend to work hard when they had children who required care, whereas women may quit their jobs to take care of the child, in line with society’s role expectations.

Conclusion and discussion

This study deals with the fatherhood perceptions and experiences of middle-class fathers of children with ASD, and the transformation of masculinity in the context of hegemonic masculinity and gender. Having a child with ASD causes a transformation of fatherhood roles and responsibilities, and fatherhood must be practiced in line with the needs of the child.

The research results revealed that being an educated and professional member of the middle class, being dual-earner parents, and having a child with autism affect the transformation of masculinity and fatherhood toward more egalitarian gender relations and nurturant fatherhood. Concordantly, Johansson and Ottemo (2015) stated that changes in fatherhood practices are closely associated with the middle class. In Turkish literature, the research by Beşpınar (2015) and Sancar (2016) showed that well-educated middle-class Turkish fathers want to spend quality time with their children and that they tend to be more nurturant.

As stated above, another factor that is effective in the transformation of masculinity and fatherhood is being a dual-earner parent. As a result of this research, it was revealed that men who are the only earner in the household spend less time with their children and tend to participate less in housework compared with men in dual-earner families. Our findings support the research by Navalkar (2010) and Lewis et al. (2000), which revealed that, especially when men are the single-earner parent, they may tend to work hard and have difficulties in allocating time to their children due to the stress and fatigue they experience to meet the increasing needs of the child with ASD. Therefore, women’s participation in working life is important in transforming masculinities and establishing a more equitable relationship between men and women (Lewis et al., 2000). To ensure women’s participation in and maintaining employment, social care services should be improved and work–family life should be organized accordingly. Better policies, financial support for low-income families and increased parental support for fathers are required to create a work–life balance for fathers, and to increase and support fathers’ participation (Hauari and Hollingworth, 2009). However, it was observed during the field process of this study that there were mostly mothers in the special education and rehabilitation centers, while fathers were very few in number. Therefore, regulations should be made to involve flexible working hours and quota practices for fathers. In addition to this, paternity education programs should be developed to support fathers’ caring roles, and social workers should take part as educators in these programs in the organizations. Such arrangements should ensure increasing the participation of men in household and child care, as well as equally sharing responsibilities with the spouse. These arrangements are important in terms of feminist social policy and social work practices.

Narratives of the participants pointed to a duality in the form of imagined fatherhood and actual fatherhood. The participant fathers sometimes became emotional and saddened while expressing that they could not experience the fatherhood they dreamed of in a society dominated by ableist ideology. It is seen that the imagined fatherhood is one based on love and respect through establishing close communication and emotional bonding with the child, but the actual fatherhood is more protective and preventive. In addition, features of the child led to a decrease in authoritarian behaviors – which are defined to be negative in fatherhood practice. Therefore, having a child with ASD transforms fatherhood practices. Concordantly, Burrell et al. (2017) and Carpenter and Towers (2008) defined this transformation as a ‘path’ and a journey with many ‘milestones’ along the road. In addition to this, Carpenter and Towers (2008) stated that fathers of children with ASD may experience disappointment due to having a bidirectional relationship with their children. While working with fathers of disabled children, social workers should be aware of the ableist and patriarchal ideology and understand diverse experiences of fathers by questioning their own ableist attitudes, so that they can help fathers develop a different fatherhood discourse.

Furthermore, our findings support the view that men act rationally, which is one of the decisive elements of masculinity socialization (Heiliger and Engelfried, 1995). When faced with negative situations, men refrain from showing their feelings and maintain their fortitude, while women seek social support by sharing their feelings (Carpenter and Towers, 2008; Gray, 2003; MacDonald and Hastings, 2010; Salas et al., 2017; Thoits, 1995). Some fathers refrain from seeking other people’s help, and may feel uncomfortable talking about their child’s disability with their friends (Pelchat et al., 2009). This research results are concordant with the available information in the literature.

In addition, the research results revealed that men’s desire to stay strong without expressing their feelings caused them to have various physiological or psychological health problems in the future. The fact that fathers do not express their feelings and try to remain strong points to the masculinity socialization process and Connell’s (1987) concept of hegemonic masculinity. Men who are raised to be strong and not to express their feelings since childhood may have to face the consequences – the cost of masculinity (Messner, 1997). As a result of this research, it was concluded that there is no transformation related to masculinity in help-seeking behavior and expressing emotions. Therefore, social workers should develop a program where fathers can share their experiences and emotions. They should carry out individual counseling, family work and group work in organizations by encouraging men to express their feelings. While working with men, social workers should also examine the pressures created by both masculine and ableist ideologies, and should work with men to raise their awareness in this direction.

Although this research has important findings, there are some limitations. The fathers who were reached and voluntarily participated in the study were from a middle socioeconomic income group, and have high level of education and awareness. That is, the participating fathers were of a homogeneous ‘socioeconomic’ sampling group. This research may stand as an important study to understand fatherhood experiences, however, it is believed that fathers having different socioeconomic characteristics may have different fatherhood perceptions and experiences. Therefore, it is important to conduct future research with fathers from various socioeconomic and educational levels.

Footnotes

Acknowledgements

We thank the fathers for participating in this study.

Authors’ note

This research was carried out in Ankara and was completed as part of the first author’s master’s dissertation under the supervision of the second author as a supervisor.

Declaration of conflicting interests

The authors declared no potential conflicts of interest with respect to the research, authorship, and/or publication of this article.

Funding

The authors received no financial support for the research, authorship, and/or publication of this article.

ORCID iD

Gizem Akoğlu

Author biographies

Gizem Akoğlu is a research assistant in the Department of Social Work at Hacettepe University, Turkey. She is interested in gender, fatherhood, masculinity, and disability.

Özlem Cankurtaran is a faculty member at the Faculty of Economics and Administrative Sciences Department of Social Work at Hacettepe University. She is interested in feminist social work, qualitative research, and empowerment.

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