Abstract
Grounded in social constructionism, the present study explored messages Black adults received about White folx and White privilege from family members in childhood and beyond. We conducted retrospective interviews with 19 self-identifying Black adults. Four primary themes emerged from participants’ accounts: (1) Black folx must work harder than White folx, (2) Black folx must be respectful to White folx, (3) Black folx must be cautious when dating or associating with White folx, and (4) Black folx will not get away with as much as White folx. Findings demonstrate how Black adults make sense of their racial identity via family messaging about White folx and White privilege. The current study offers unique theoretical and practical implications. Theoretically, findings illuminate the connection between social constructionism and racial socialization in Black families. Practically, findings reveal ways professionals can increase awareness and understanding of Black folx’ experiences of racial identity development in family contexts. Limitations and future research directions are discussed.
Historically, Black families’ physical and psychological treatment in the United States is unique from that of other racial groups. The historical, racially-motivated oppression of Black families in the United States (e.g., the Trans-Atlantic Slave Trade; the Jim Crow era; the over-policing, slaying, silencing, and segregation of Black bodies and families) necessitates an understanding of how Black folx 1 communicate and make sense of race in their lives (Fett, 2010; Griffin, 2015; Hall, 2009; Hutchins & Nelson, 2021; Minniear & Soliz, 2019; Smith, 2013). Today, Black folx continue to face racial discrimination, oppression, and prejudice in the United States – personally, socially, politically, physically, and economically (Griffin, 2015; James et al., 2014; Lewis et al., 2017; McIntosh et al., 2020; Mosley et al., 2020). Experiences of racial discrimination are related to an increase in depressive symptoms and psychological distress for many Black Americans (Pieterse et al., 2012). The concept of “White privilege” is entrenched in conversations about racial discrimination and prejudice toward Black folx. White privilege refers to the unearned and often-unacknowledged advantages White people receive due to having White skin (McIntosh, 2001). White privilege is often unseen and/or unavowed by White folx yet is inherent to and inseparable from feelings and acts of prejudice against people of color (DiAngelo, 2018; McIntosh, 2001).
Black Americans deserve answers to how a culture of systemic racism, upheld by the ideology of White supremacy (i.e., the belief that White people are superior to other races) and the (in)actions of White folx, has influenced the formation of their own racial identities (Allen, 2010; Shafer, 2015). Racial socialization, or the process by which we learn about race, is critical to understanding one’s racial group membership and racial identity (Berkel et al., 2009; Butler-Barnes et al., 2018). In the current study, race refers to groupings of humans based on physical features such as skin color and other observable markers such as accent and dialect and racial identity refers to a facet of one’s self-concept that is related to one’s membership in a racial group, including the significance one puts on race in defining oneself, as well as one’s interpretation of what it means to be a Black individual in U.S. society (see Minniear & Soliz, 2019; Sellers et al., 1998). Research indicates that racial socialization messages regarding equality, racial harmony, and positive self-worth are correlated with positive feelings about one’s own racial identity for Black youths (Butler-Barnes et al., 2018). Specifically, Berkel and colleagues (2009) found that primary caregivers’ own experience of racial discrimination prompted more racial socialization (i.e., sharing of messages that centered on Black pride and prepared children for racism). These racial socialization messages were positively linked to youths’ self-pride (i.e., the development of a positive racial identity and overall self-image). Similarly, Butler-Barnes and colleagues (2018) found that adolescent boys and girls reported receiving positive racial socialization messages from parents (i.e., messages about self-worth and racial pride) as well as egalitarian messages from parents (i.e., messages that focus on the equality of Black and White people). These racial socialization messages served a buffering effect on youth outcomes (i.e., racial centrality and public regard) following school-based discrimination (Butler-Barnes et al., 2018). However, the role of family conversations about White folx and White privilege in the racial socialization of Black youths remains largely unknown. This study fills this gap, with the overarching goal of understanding how Black folx make sense of their racial identity via conversations about White folx and White privilege with family members in childhood and beyond. Ideally, a more nuanced understanding of racial socialization for Black folx, their identity development, and expression will be made possible through this work.
Racial socialization in Black families
Racial socialization is the lifelong, dynamic process by which a person acquires implicit and explicit messages about one’s race (Coard & Sellers, 2005; Hughes et al., 2006). While parents are the primary source of racial socialization, other family members, including siblings and grandparents, can impact the formation of young Black folx’ racial identities (Lesane-Brown, 2006; Minniear & Soliz, 2019). Through racial socialization, parents (and close others) can shape a child’s beliefs and attitudes about race (Minniear & Soliz, 2019; Murray & Mandara, 2002). Racial socialization not only teaches Black youth how to navigate experiences of discrimination and racism but also fosters a variety of positive outcomes for Black youth, including positive racial identity development, increases in mental health, and positive academic and social outcomes (Huguley et al., 2019; Minniear & Soliz, 2019; Socha & Diggs, 1999; Thomas & Speight, 1999).
Beyond engendering Black racial identity, Black families use conversations about race to impart children with an understanding of the interracial correspondence between Black folx and the White hegemony (see Sanders Thompson, 1994; Thomas & Speight, 1999). In Sanders Thompson’s (1994) work, racial barrier messages were central to Black parents’ racial socialization of their children. Racial barrier messages provided children with knowledge about the racism they may face and emphasized the importance of treating other people well, despite not being treated fairly by White folx (Sanders Thompson, 1994).
The current study seeks to build upon this scholarship by examining how Whiteness permeates conversations about race in Black families. Specifically, we seek to build upon findings from Hughes and colleague’s (2006) and Minniear and Soliz’s (2019) work contending parents’ ethnic-racial socialization of children often include messages that serve to culturally socialize children (i.e., messages that teach children about their racial or ethnic heritage and history) promote mistrust among children (i.e., messages that promote wariness and caution about other racial groups) and prepare children for bias (i.e., messages that promote children’s awareness of discrimination and offer suggestions for coping) by specifically focusing on Black families’ discussions about White supremacy and White privilege. Further, from a cultural socialization standpoint (see Hughes et al., 2006; Lesane-Brown, 2006), we understand identities can be mutually constituted. Thus, examining Black racial identity development through exploring conversations about Whiteness can offer unique insight into how Black and White racial identities interact with one another in conversations about White supremacy and White privilege in Black Americans’ family discourse. Ultimately, exploring these conversations may glean insight into how Black folx position and understand their Black racial identity, juxtaposed against Whiteness, within the larger racial landscape of the United States – a landscape where the ideology of White supremacy operates and is personally (e.g., values, beliefs, feelings) interpersonally (e.g., actions, behavior, language), culturally (e.g., beauty, truth), and institutionally (e.g., rules, policies, procedures) upheld and perpetuated by others (Allen, 2010; McIntosh, 2001).
White supremacy and White privilege
White supremacy is an ideology that contends White folx are superior to other races and promotes a racial hierarchy through practices such as selective hiring, over-policing, and redlining (Allen, 2010). These practices simultaneously oppress people of color and afford unearned advantages to White folx, also known as White privilege (McIntosh, 2001). White privilege, while often clearly visible to people of color, is commonly overlooked or disputed by its beneficiaries (DiAngelo, 2018; McIntosh, 2001). This denial often involves a belief in a post-racial society (i.e., a refusal to acknowledge the systemic racism continuing to affect Black folx in the United States) (Crenshaw, 1997). Ideologies such as “colorblindness,” a concept that denies racism and disregards racial group differences, perpetuate post-racial beliefs (Gaither et al., 2019; Pulido, 2015). Acceptance of a post-racial America allows for White folx to live in racial oblivion, whereby they do not acknowledge or question the privileges their skin color has afforded (McIntosh, 2001), resulting in the perpetuation of “Whiteness invisibility” whereby "the notion of ‘race’ is applied almost exclusively to non-White people” (Bonds & Inwood, 2016, p. 717). This study purposefully centers Whiteness in Black families’ messaging because, despite some White folx desire to live in ignorance and oblivion, the ideology of White supremacy permeates Black folx’ lived experiences in obvious and impactful ways (Allen, 2010; Bonds & Inwood, 2016).
Indeed, recent statistics reveal that Black men are 2.5 times more likely to be killed by police than White men, and Black women are 1.4 times more likely to be killed by police than White women (Edwards et al., 2019). Black folx 18–49 years old are two times more likely to die from heart disease than White folx (Center for Disease Control and Prevention, 2017), and Black mothers and children die at disproportionately higher rates during childbirth than their White counterparts (Center for Disease Control and Prevention, 2019; Hanks et al., 2018). Black folx have a higher unemployment rate than White people across all educational levels and age groups (Ajilore, 2020), and White households have a net worth that is ten times greater than the net worth of a Black household (McIntosh et al., 2020). These statistics paint an honest, albeit disheartening, image of race relations in the United States that confirms Americans are not living in a post-racial society (Crenshaw, 1997; McIntosh, 2001; Pulido, 2015). So, while White folx can downplay or deny their White privilege, Black families likely feel compelled to discuss Whiteness, as the societal reign of White supremacy largely accounts for the racial disparities that Black folks experience daily in the United States. Thus, it is necessary to understand the messages Black family members pass down to the younger Black generation about White folx and White privilege and how these messages impact the formation of Black racial identity. Guided by social constructionism theory, a greater understanding of Black racial identity socialization, formation, and expression is made possible.
Socially constructing racial identity
Social constructionists aim to illuminate how people create realities through various relational and linguistic processes (Gergen, 1985; Leeds-Hurwitz, 2006; Young & Collin, 2004). A social constructivist paradigm is the belief that one’s development is shaped by and through social interactions. Meaning and identity arise from conversations in our relationships and social systems such that our identities and knowledge of the world are not naturally or biologically formulated but, instead, determined by social forces (Allen, 2004). Social constructionism occurs at micro levels, where reality construction and sense-making occur within conversations with close others (Cunliffe, 2008). In other words, how Black families talk about Whiteness and White privilege has the potential to not only shape Black adults’ perceptions of White people, but these internalized messages can manifest as reality.
Social constructionism is a useful theoretical lens for understanding messages Black adults receive from their families about the privileges often afforded to White people due to the color of their skin. When these communicative messages are internalized and accepted, their decoded meaning can influence how Black folx see themselves and the world they live in. Moreover, how Black families talk about Whiteness and privilege can influence how study participants make meaning of their racial identity, familial history, and significant events related to their family’s experience in America. Because we, the authors, view race as a social construct with varied meanings across history and geographical lines (Delgado & Stefancic, 2001, p. 7), we acknowledge that Whiteness is a racial identity whose meaning can vary between person and location. Moreover, we acknowledge that bi-racial people exist within Black family structures where their perception of Whiteness and White privilege may vary, especially for those situated in Black and White racial identities (Cardwell et al., 2020; Cardwell & Soliz, 2019).
Conversations occurring in Black families about White folx and White privilege likely play a vital role in Black folx’ racial identity construction. Examining young Black folx’ social construction of their racial identity is integral to better understanding how Black Americans formulate opinions of their racial identity, or racialized reality, via family messaging. Findings may garner a deeper understanding of how Black folx see themselves as racialized beings and, subsequently, perceive and interact with White people in a society dominated by the ideology of White supremacy and White folx’ White privilege. Thus, to explore the social construction of Black racial identity via family messaging about White folx and White privilege, we present the following research question:
How, if at all, do Black individuals make sense of their racial identity through family messaging about White folx and White privilege?
Method
The present study sought to understand how Black adults made sense of their own and others’ racial identities through interactions with family members about White folx and White privilege. The first author interviewed 19 Black adults to achieve this goal. Then, we thematically analyzed our data to make sense of participants’ reported experiences.
Sample
Participants were 19 U.S. Black adults from 11 different U.S. states. Most participants identified Black as their only racial identity (n = 17), with two participants identifying both Black and White as their racial identities. Participants identified as both cisgender men (n = 12) and cisgender women (n = 7), with ages ranging from 19 to 63 years old (M = 31.47, SD = 12.73). Most participants identified as heterosexual (n = 15), with three identifying as bisexual and one identifying as gay. Participants described their relationship status as single (n = 8), married (n = 7), dating (n = 3), and engaged (n = 1). When asked about their highest educational attainment, nine reported having a bachelor’s degree, six reported having a master’s degree, three reported having a high school diploma/GED, and one reported having some high school. When asked about their employment status, most reported being employed by others (n = 13), with two looking for work, two being unable to work due to a disability, one being self-employed, and one being laid off. When reporting their social class growing up, nine reported middle class, five reported lower-middle-class, four reported lower class, and one reported “other.”
We asked participants to reflect on conversations they had with their parent(s) or other close family members about White folx and White privilege. All nineteen participants reported having heterosexual parents. Nine participants shared conversations they had with both their mother and father, three participants discussed conversations with both their mother and father as well as siblings, aunts, uncles, grandparents, and family friends, and seven participants reported on conversations they had with only their mother.
Procedures
After obtaining IRB approval, participants were recruited via Facebook groups and pages and through respondent-driven sampling techniques (i.e., word of mouth; network sampling). To participate, individuals had to meet the following requirements: (a) be 18 years of age or older and (b) identify as Black. Participants first completed an online survey where they consented to participate in the study, provided demographic information, and indicated their interest in being contacted for an interview. The first author reached out to schedule an interview with those who provided contact information. All participants who responded completed an in-depth, semi-structured interview.
The interview covered various topics about communication and socialization in Black families. The data reported in this manuscript center around participants’ conversations with family members about White people and White privilege, specifically. Sample interview questions include: “Did you ever have conversations with your parent(s) or other family members about White people or White privilege? If so, what was said?” “Did your parent(s) or family members ever say anything about White people, good or bad?” “Can you recall a specific conversation you had with your parent(s) or other family members about White people or White privilege? If so, would you mind sharing it with me?”. All interviews took place over the phone and ranged from 62 to 161 (M = 100) minutes. Interviews were audio-recorded and transcribed verbatim, resulting in 492 pages of single-spaced text. Each participant who completed an interview received a $25 Amazon e-gift card.
Data analysis
The authors followed Braun and Clarke’s (2006) six steps for inductive thematic analysis to examine the data. First, we re-familiarized ourselves with each interview by reading and re-reading the transcripts multiple times. We then began synthesizing our data by taking detailed, individual notes about what ideas were pronounced and meaningful in the dataset. Thoughts of social constructions of racial identity, as well as narrative inquiry, sensemaking theory, and storytelling, guided our initial thinking and possible interpretation and analysis of the data. Third, we began to identify themes in the data. We followed Owen’s (1984) criteria for identifying themes: recurrence, repetition, and forcefulness. Emergent themes centered on the idea that Black folx must work harder than White people for an equal return, the belief that White people are afforded a separate set of freedoms or less strict rules that Black folx do not have access to, and a shared sense that Black folx are expected to be inferior to their White counterparts. Fourth, we employed the constant comparative analysis technique to compare each emergent theme against all other themes to ensure each theme was distinctive (Strauss & Corbin, 1990). Fifth, we assigned theme names and selected exemplars to support each theme. Last, we produced the final report, which entailed writing the story of our data.
Data verification procedures
We engaged in three data verification procedures: audit trail, investigator triangulation, and thick descriptions. First, we created an audit trail by keeping detailed notes throughout each step of the data analysis process (Lincoln & Guba, 1985). Second, we employed investigator triangulation whereby we compared our initial codes until we reached a consensus. Investigator triangulation resulted in expanding themes and changing theme names. Lastly, we used thick descriptions – in the form of rich exemplars – to support our themes. We integrated thick descriptions to help readers best understand our participants’ experiences. Of note, the three researchers represent a diversity of age, race, gender, organizational tenure, and roles. All three researchers bring a passion for, commitment to, and experience with studying intersections of race and identity. We believe this diversity of experience, identities, and perspectives provided richness to the current study’s framing, analysis, and conclusions.
Findings
In this study, we explored the social construction of Black adults’ racial identity through family messaging about White folx and White privilege in childhood and beyond. Four primary themes materialized through participants’ recollections: (1) Black folx must work harder than White folx, (2) Black folx will not get away with as much as White folx, (3), Black folx must be respectful to White folx, and (4) Black folx must be cautious when dating or associating with White folx. Each theme is explicated below.
Black folx must work harder than White folx
Black folx received many messages from parents and close family members about White folx and White privilege that constructed participants’ perceptions (and realities, see Leeds-Hurwitz, 2006) of their racial identity. Many of these messages focused on the need for Black folx to work harder than White folx to “get just as much” (Julius
2
). As Kobe recollected: White privilege conversations happened with the fact that we [Black folx] have to be two or three times better at something to be on the same grounding. I’d say that’s the biggest thing. Then, like I said, they [parents] would talk about how a White kid, he might have a dad who is CEO of a company, they’d [parents] say, ‘Well, he has a job from now [White kid] but you don’t know if you have a job from now.’
Kobe’s parents not only emphasized the need to work harder to be on a similar footing as White folx but also acknowledged the distinct privilege White folx experience in terms of generational wealth and job opportunities due to having White skin. Like Kobe, Julius recalled his parents socializing him to the reality that he did not have the same opportunities as White folx and, thus, had to work so much harder: I had to maximize every opportunity, whether it was education or anything else. Not just because it was important, but because most Black people didn’t get the chance. White people, they get these chances. When I went to college, they were like, ‘Don’t get fucked up. Don’t do all these sorts of stuff. Don’t do this stuff because you’re Black. This is the only shot you get.’ That pressure is on you forever, so I always felt the pressure to perform… When it came to economics, when it came to opportunities, when it came to the motivation behind doing well, it was always ‘they have a leg up on you.’ ‘You have to do ten times, 20 times, 30 times more to get just as much. If you meet a qualified White person, well, you’re really fucked because they’re going to take them [White people] over you in a heartbeat.’ It’s the opposite of affirmative action that a lot of White people that don’t like it go against. They’re like, ‘Why did I qualify?’ While we get the message like, ‘Whether you’re qualified or not, you’re going to get it over me anyway.’ I have to be doubly qualified. My motivation, for the most part, was survival. It wasn’t ‘follow your dreams.’
Julius’ account highlights the unprecedented amount of pressure he, as well as other participants, felt to work hard to survive in a White-dominated society. The messaging from Julius’ family highlights the perceived disparity between Black and White folx, such that Black folx get more messaging about surviving whereas White folx get more messaging about thriving.
As many accounts reflected, these were not one-time conversations in Black families. For some participants, their parents were not the only people in their family telling them to work harder. Many had siblings and family friends in their lives who discussed the necessity of working extremely hard to reach the same level of success as their White counterparts. Mac described a time when a family friend explained this idea: “Also, my mom’s friend, she’s a political science professor at a college, and she always talked to me a lot too about like being different and how I was just going to have to work really hard. I had to work through that as a Black, gay male and just being different and how people are going to treat me differently.” Kara also remembered her parents telling her to “work twice as hard” as her White peers to get a lead role in the school play. She explained: I went to a predominantly Black high school but the theater department is predominantly White. The White people typically get the lead roles, even though it’s not accurately represented in our school and things like that. I would sometimes be discouraged just because it’s like ‘When is my chance is going to come? I know that I’m as good as those people and it’s not fair.’ My mom would kind of just really go back to, ‘You have to work twice as hard.’
Evident in Kara’s account is the trust participants felt to seek guidance and support from family members when they encountered prejudice and discrimination. Unfortunately, for some Black folx like Ty, when academic or professional success is achieved, it may be justified in ways that overlook their skills, knowledge, and ability. Ty also recalled a conversation with his mother following an interaction with a friend who claimed he was accepted to multiple master’s programs only because he was Black, as they needed to “fill a quota”: I do remember my mom saying, ‘It’s upsetting that she [participant’s friend] thinks that her privilege doesn’t shine in so many regards, and then there’s the one time that you [participant] might be getting a pass because of your skin, and it’s a problem.’ She’s [Mom’s] like, ‘You know what? If you have to do that 110%, do it, but just know that you don’t have to prove yourself to anyone because you have the ability to do whatever you need to do. You shouldn’t be limited because of the color of your color skin, but it does unfortunately happen.’
Overall, Black folx were socialized, by family members and close others, to understand being Black necessitates working harder to achieve career and academic goals (see Ferguson & Dougherty, 2022). In many of these conversations, Black folx’ opportunities were juxtaposed against White folx opportunities – demonstrating an awareness of the unfair, often privileged, treatment White folx receive in U.S. society. Messages about working harder than White folx not only motivated participants to put in the extra work but also tuned them into the reality of what it meant to be a Black student and worker in the United States.
Black folx do not get away with as much as White folx
Many participants had recollections of their parents explaining White people could get away with illegal activity or mistakes more easily than they, as a Black people, could. Some parents talked to their children about how White people “think they can do whatever” (Cameron) whereas other parents emphasized that Black children had one chance to succeed in comparison to White folx (who had many chances and were able to make many mistakes). Jordan drew upon past experiences talking to his mother to describe this idea, saying: I guess the general theme is that my mom had this saying sometimes where White people do something ignorant [and] you go, ‘Look at them… wasting that good, White skin.’ It’s like, ‘Exactly.’ We talk about how you can get away with a lot more things when you’re White versus me.
Jordan’s mothers’ words helped to construct two equally important discursive realities: (a) that White people engaging in parallel situations to Black folx will not face the repercussions Black folx will and (b) that White people have it so much easier than Black folx and should recognize the privilege afforded to them for having White skin, not waste it. Julius described similar sentiments shared with him by his parents: I remember one I used to get all the time is their mistakes are mistakes, your mistakes are your life. I remember I used to get told, ‘If you’re Black, you don’t get mistakes. You don’t get second chances.’ I knew that like, ‘Okay, I can’t do these things or I’m going to get clapped up,’ versus, ‘They [White people] can do anything and they won’t get clapped up.’ A lot of it came with that mindset behind it. That type of White privilege.
Indeed, Black folx received many messages that alerted them to the preferential treatment White folx often receive due to having White skin (McIntosh, 2001). As a result, many of our participants internalized the idea that being Black meant mistakes or missteps were to be avoided at all costs. Mistakes could cost Black folx their dignity, education, and/or life whereas White folx often got many chances with no serious repercussions.
Black folx must be respectful to White people
Many participants recalled their parents discussing the need to be respectful to White people in work contexts and beyond. Specifically, Black folx remembered their parents telling them they needed to remain respectful when speaking with White folx to survive and not gain unwanted attention (Ferguson & Dougherty, 2022). As Brandon detailed: It was in terms of the workplace, coming from my mom since she’s in more corporate America, ‘Check your attitude because you know White people are going to think you’re mean. They’re going to think this and that about you. You’re going to always be seen as the aggressor regardless of whatever happened, you are the one that was in the wrong. To them, some Whites are going to think that you are already going to dislike them, or be mean, or be whatever. Prove them wrong and show them that you actually know how to talk with some respect and that you see them as a person as well, and all that.’ It was very much, ‘though they’re not all assholes, at the same time, you don’t have to come off as an asshole either. Just be the best version of yourself so that they could see that.’
As Brandon’s mom’s words demonstrate, Black people often face the added pressure in social contexts to “prove them (White people) wrong” – to prove they are not “mean,” they are not an “aggressor,” and/or they are not an “asshole.” Indeed, Brandon’s experience hearing this from his mom sheds light on the actions Black folx must make in a White supremacist society to remain “unproblematic” in White people’s eyes. These statements likely socialize Black folx to be hyper-aware of their behavior in social contexts, due to their race, because they (White folx) are always watching. As participants’ accounts revealed, this can create a disconnect between how Black folx truly see themselves and how they are forced to present around White folx. Amber explained how messaging from her mom about the “intersection in being Black and a woman” resulted in her code-switching in a predominantly White workplace. Amber first explained: “Especially, being a woman, she [mom] constantly gets on me about how I come across with people, even though she knows me, and she knows that I’m not aggressive and stuff.” She went on: “I know once I’m passionate about something I’m really direct. She [mom] said a lot of White people can take that as being aggressive or having an attitude or being angry because it’s like the angry Black woman stereotype… I have to deal with that, with being direct about what I’m talking about or my tone of voice and stuff.” Amber then explained her use of code-switching in White spaces: It was weird because I felt like I couldn’t be my full self… I had to code-switch a lot at work. It’s mentally exhausting, not being able to talk how I normally talk, especially going to my first job I had when I graduated, which, I was working with kids, all the kids were Black, the staff were Black. We had a few staff that were White, but I talked how I wanted to, I interacted with the kids how I wanted to. Then once I got my current job, I was one of three Black people, so I felt like I had to be nice all the time or not come off like I was being mean, even though I don’t like talking all day. Not that I’m being mean, but I’m shy, one, and then, two, I don’t like talking all day to anybody.
Amber’s contrast between her first workplace (primarily Black folx) to her current workplace (primarily White folx) illuminates how the process of tailoring one’s actions and communication to White folx can be exhausting – internally (e.g., feeling a sense of discomfort for being inauthentic or not fully whom they perceive themselves to be) and externally (e.g., having to hide emotion; having to communicate more excessively and purposefully than one normally would). Indeed, participants’ accounts revealed parents’ messaging about treating White folx respectfully was rooted in one primary idea: protection. Parents wanted to equip their children with social skills that could potentially lessen their experiences of discrimination and prejudice. Indeed, Darrius’ dad warned him that not all White people would treat him as his White neighbors did, so the best thing Darrius could do was remain respectful: I remember my dad told me that when you’re out there, you might be treated very differently by other White people. Just because our neighbors are friendly doesn’t mean that the world will treat you in the same manner. All my father insisted was that the same way we behave around home, we behave towards our White neighbors, just behave the same outside there, because you will not get the same reaction as the White neighbors give you.
Overall, family members called on participants to carefully consider and accommodate their language, personality, and attitude in the presence of White folx. Family members and close others largely sought to protect their children by equipping them with the tools necessary to remain “unproblematic” in a White-dominated society. Indeed, findings give credence to the idea Black folx must be respectful (see: hyper-aware, more censored, more deliberate, and/or arguably “less Black”) to White people, as being respectful may serve as a safeguard from conflict, prejudice, and/or discrimination from White folx.
Black folx must be cautious dating or associating with a White person
Participants received explicit messaging warning them of the potential negative ramifications inherent to dating or associating with White folx. Much like the previous theme, parents and other family members had these conversations to promote protection and safeguarding. Many participants received explicit messages that they should not date White folx. As Amber explained, “I do remember when we were younger our parents being like, ‘You’re not bringing no White men home,’ or my mom to my brother, ‘You’re not bringing no White girl home blah, blah, blah.’” Brandon described a similar interaction with his parents, saying “When I was young, I remember a whole lot of, ‘Stop bringing home a White girl. No snow bunnies in the house!’” Other participants recalled more indirect conversations that served the same socialization purpose – to be cautious about associating with White people. As Gene recalled: My grandparents, once again, they’re in their 70s now. They say, ‘Them White people,’ a lot. I don’t think they talk about the whole White race but they’re saying those kinds of White people. They’ll say, ‘Them White people chased me home’ or, ‘They tried to arrest me,’ that kind of thing.
Evident in Gene’s account is that although his grandparents did not explicitly tell him not to associate with a White person (in comparison to participants’ accounts like Amber’s and Brandon’s), the underlying message was still loud and clear: be careful associating with White people as they can create all sorts of problems for Black folx (e.g., chase you home; arrest you).
Indeed, participants’ parents were highly concerned about the potential negative and serious ramifications that could surface when associating with White people. Participants’ parents, like Kobe’s, worried for their children’s safety when in the presence of White people: They [parents] were very always concerned if I was around a White person, because they don’t want something to go wrong, and then I get blamed or something like that. It was almost like if something happened, and it happened with me and a White person, then I was going to be the one got blamed. I was the one, gonna be the one in trouble. So, it was like they were just extra worried in those instances.
Similarly, as Mike recalled, his mother’s messaging about avoiding dating White people was largely rooted in her desire to protect him: “If there was ever a situation where a White woman would have - where you ever to have sex, and she would claim that I raped her, who’s likely to be believed? It’s not the Black guy. She was trying to protect me from that.” Participants’ parents built upon the idea that Black folx needed to be careful when initiating relationships with White people. This hesitancy from Black parents’ regarding their child’s association with White people is certainly understandable, given White folx are more likely to be perceived as victims of crime whereas Black folx are more likely to be perceived as perpetrators of crime (see Dixon & Linz, 2000; Pallone & Hennessy, 2000). Additionally, historical policing of Black reproduction through anti-miscegenation laws and violent practices that protect White purity and target Black folx that engage in romantic relationships with White folx (Roberts, 1997) has left a legacy of anxiety and fear for those engaged in interracial relationships. Thus, parents’ interracial anxieties, which they pass onto children, likely stem from their own experiences and/or what they see in the media on White victimization and the overrepresentation of Black people as perpetrators.
Parents also worried about the reactions their child might receive from a potential partner’s family. Like many participants, Kobe’s parents felt apprehensive about him dating a White woman, saying: “At first, my parents were concerned. They were worried, like, ‘Oh, well, do you know her parents are okay?’ This and that, ‘And her grandparents?’ Just because they were concerned, they were worried.” Similar to parents’ messaging about being respectful to White folx, their worry about dating or associating with White folx was rooted in a desire to protect their child. In this theme, protection from false allegations, discrimination, and prejudice from White folx and their families. Overall, through family conversations about White folx and White privilege, Black folx were socialized to understand (a) what it meant to be Black and (b) how being Black would factor into their lived realities in a society upheld by the ideology of White supremacy.
Discussion
Grounded in social constructionism (see Gergen, 1985; Leeds-Hurwitz, 2006), the present study explored messages Black adults received about White folx and White privilege from family members in childhood and beyond. Four primary themes animated participants’ recollections: (1) Black folx must work harder than White folx, (2) Black folx will not get away with as much as White folx, (3), Black folx must be respectful to White folx, and (4) Black folx must be cautious when dating or associating with White folx. Findings illustrate how Black adults make sense of their racial identity via family messaging about White folx and White privilege. In addition, a host of theoretical and practical implications, discussed below, emerged.
Theoretical implications
While previous research explored the messages Black folx explicitly received about Black racial identity (Minniear & Soliz, 2019), the current study focused on how Black families discussed White privilege and White folx with Black youth and how these conversations socialized Black youth to understand their racial identity. Specifically, we looked at the discursive meaning passed down from family members and close others (e.g., parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, family friends) to Black folx in childhood and beyond. Similar to past research, our findings revealed the unique ways in which Black family members and close others socialized younger Black generations as a way to prepare them for, protect them from, and warn them about the discrimination they may face in their lives due to their race (see Huguley et al., 2019; Minniear & Soliz, 2019; Socha & Diggs, 1999; Thomas & Speight, 1999). In addition, prior research on Black experiences and family messages revealed how socio-historical issues impacted the communication and livelihoods of Black adults (Minniear & Soliz, 2019). Our findings bolster this line of work by revealing how the sociopolitical position of White folx and White privilege significantly affect the way Black parents socialize and talk to their children about what it means to be a Black person in the United States. Specifically, Black parents socially constructed realities for Black children about White folx and White privilege that many participants internalized, accepted, and ultimately impacted participants’ racial identity formation.
Indeed, Black parents and close others appeared to be astutely aware of the advantages afforded to White folx in academic, work, and judiciary contexts – often pulling from their own life experiences to socialize their children about what it means to be Black in America. For participants in the current study, being Black meant working harder than White folx to achieve just as much, remaining respectful to White folx as a means of protecting oneself in work contexts and beyond, being cautious and skeptical of associating with or dating White people to safeguard oneself against punitive action and/or discrimination, and realizing that Black folx do not have the opportunity to make the same mistakes White folx do. These discursive meanings about what it means to be Black in America both mirror and expand prior research. First, our theme of Black folx must be respectful to White folx mirrors Sanders Thompson’s (1994) finding that Black parents often passed messages down to their children about treating White people well, despite not being treated fairly by White folx in return. The current study added to this body of work by highlighting the specific discursive messaging parents offered to promote children’s respect toward White folx, as well as how Black children lived out these messages in their actions and discourse. Similarly, our theme of Black folx must be cautious when dating or associating with White folx mirrors Thomas and Speight’s (1999) work, which revealed that Black parents often socialize their children to understand the negative things White folx might do. Moreover, this theme is reminiscent of Hughes and colleagues (2006) findings on the promotion of mistrust and preparation for bias evident in parents’ racial socialization messages. Altogether, our findings further confirm that racial socialization is a dynamic process that occurs across the lifespan (see Hughes et al., 2006).
While the current study mirrors previous findings demonstrating that preparation for bias and racial pride are factors of racial socialization (Lee & Ahn, 2013), the current study bolsters this understanding of preparation for bias within a White privilege context, with our results showing the significance put on being prepared for not only bias but also the barriers Black folx may face due to the ideology of White supremacy, and White privilege, more specifically. Namely, our findings expand prior research by illuminating how the juxtaposition of Whiteness to Blackness served to inform, teach, and influence younger Black generations about their positionality in the world and the actions one must take to succeed in a society where White folx receive unfair advantages due to the color of their skin (see McIntosh, 2001). Prior research suggests that preparation for bias reduces negative behavioral responses but does not reduce negative cognitive or affective responses (Burt et al., 2012). Future research should explore how Black folx experience negative cognitive or affective responses about their race and their abilities compared to White counterparts via family conversations about White folx and White privilege.
Furthermore, we extend the literature on social constructionism by demonstrating how Black family messaging about White folx and White privilege impacts Black youths’ understandings of their racial identity. Social constructionism places great significance on the language used to construct one’s identity and reality (Leeds-Hurwitz, 2006). Thus, by looking at Black folx’ messages from family members and close others through a social constructionism lens, we achieved a greater understanding of how interactions and experiences Black youth have with family members shape their racial identity and racialized realities in U.S. society. The ideas and messages about White people and White privilege that Black adolescents hear not only shape their future interactions and thoughts about White people but arguably more importantly, how they make meaning of their racial identity, familial history, and significant events related to their family’s experience in America and ultimately perceive themselves and their positionality in U.S. society. Therefore, one can infer that hearing messages and specific language about White privilege and White people may affect the trajectory and distinctly social aspects of Black adults’ lives, such as their selection of partners or peers and their interactions with White folx in academic and work contexts. Future research should further analyze how conversations of White privilege within the public sphere impact the messages Black folx receive from their parents and other close family members.
Practical implications
While Black folx may be socialized to understand White privilege as an inherent reality, the impact of White privilege is often physically, mentally, and emotionally draining (Griffin, 2015; James et al., 2014; Lewis et al., 2017; McIntosh et al., 2020; Mosley et al., 2020), as is demonstrated in our participants’ accounts. As a result, and due to the findings in the current study, we offer practical advice for professionals (e.g., practitioners, therapists) who work with Black youth and adults, as well as Black parents. Chiefly, we call on professionals working with Black youth and adults to consider participants’ sense-making about racial identity in light of the ideology of White supremacy undergirding social life in the United States.
Professionals should consider how Black adults may resist and assert power via discourse to dismantle the master narrative of White supremacy. For example, as our findings demonstrate, Black folx may be cautious when choosing a romantic partner as they must consider the repercussions they may face if they date a White person. Historically, Black folx were disproportionately positioned as perpetrators of crime and White folx as victims (see Dixon & Linz, 2000; Pallone & Hennessy, 2000), and Black folx were often punished more harshly for violating laws on interracial coupling in the United States (Roberts, 1997) – engendering interracial anxiety and general mistrust with Black-White interracial dating among Black family members (Hughes et al., 2006). Naturally, then, some Black parents may be fearful and cautious toward interracial dating, and pass interracial anxiety messaging onto children, although they are not wholly anti-interracial coupling. In fact, research has revealed not all Black-White interracial couples experience parental disapproval (Bell & Hastings, 2015). However, since anxiety and depression are among Black Americans’ strongest discrimination-related mental health issues (Lee & Ahn, 2013), it would be beneficial for professionals to legitimize feelings Black folx’ and/or their families may carry regarding interracial dating.
Our findings further demonstrate that it is essential for professionals to understand the additional pressure (from both internal and family sources) for performance and the potential negative ramifications Black folx must consider in both academic and work contexts. It is important professionals are keenly aware of Black folx’ lived realities and give voice to these understandings in their work and advice for Black youth and adults. These are but a few examples of how professionals can engage the current study’s findings to demonstrate an awareness of the intersection between racialization and socialization in Black families.
Additionally, we call on Black parents to consider utilizing our findings in the current study to inform their racial socialization of their own children regarding White folx and White privilege. Through examining the implications of parental messages on children in the current study, current parents are afforded an opportunity to consider the potential impact of specific messaging about White folx for their own children now and in the future.
Limitations and future directions
While the current study provided a deeper understanding of the messages animating Black folx’ conversations with family members about White folx and White privilege, and how such conversations served to cultivate a better understanding of one’s racial identity, it is necessary to discuss the study’s limitations. First, participants were asked to retrospectively recall messages from parent(s) or other family members. Although many participants recalled specific conversations and messages, details could have been left out depending on how much time had passed since they received these messages, an inherent limitation to retrospective interviewing techniques. Looking forward, it would be interesting to examine what messages parents in the past five years shared with their children regarding White privilege and White folx. Doing so may glean similar or different insights, a task left for future research to deduce. Second, it is important to note all interviews took place over the phone. In-person interviews may have garnered richer, more detailed accounts. On the other hand, individuals may have also felt a greater sense of anonymity over the phone. Future research ought to explore Black family messaging via in-person interviews to gauge whether these hypothesized discrepancies in richness and detail hold true and whether similar themes emerge via in-person interviews. Third, and finally, all 19 self-identifying Black adults who participated in this study noted receiving messages from heterosexual-identifying parents. Thus, the current study’s findings represent a dominant social perspective. Future studies should explore how communication around race and privilege manifests differently within sexually diverse Black families
Conclusion
The current study explored how Black adults made sense of their own racial identity via family messaging about White folx and White privilege. Findings demonstrated four distinct types of messages Black youth received from family members about White folx and White privilege, all of which cultivated Black identity uniquely. Our findings culminated in a host of theoretical and practical contributions. We implore researchers to continue to explore how Black folx’ racial identity is socially constructed via family discourse.
Footnotes
Acknowledgements
This work was previously presented as a Top 4 Paper in the Family Communication Division at the 2021 National Communication Association Annual Conference.
Author contributions
Dr Leslie R. Nelson (PhD, University of Missouri, 2018) is an Associate Professor in the Department of Communication Studies at California Polytechnic State University. Samantha Fitzgerald (B.A., California Polytechnic State University, 2021) is a graduate of the Department of Communication Studies at California Polytechnic State University. Dr Darvelle Hutchins (PhD, University of Missouri, 2020) is a former Full-Time Lecturer in the Department of Communication Studies at California Polytechnic State University and is now a Vice President of Equity and Social Impact for the New Orleans Saints (NFL) and Pelicans (NBA).
Declaration of conflicting interests
The author(s) declared no potential conflicts of interest with respect to the research, authorship, and/or publication of this article.
Funding
The author(s) received no financial support for the research, authorship, and/or publication of this article.
Notes
Data Availability Statement
The
used in the research cannot be publicly shared but are available upon request. The data can be obtained by emailing:
