Recipients' Perceptions of Support Attempts and Attributions for Support Attempts that Fail

We asked 151 people with multiple sclerosis (MS) to describe support attempts that they found especially helpful and unhelpful. These data were compared with findings from prior investigations of bereaved individuals and cancer patients. Across the three samples, expressions of concern, love and understanding were regarded as most helpful. The chronically ill identified two categories as unhelpful: minimization (e.g. challenging the seriousness or existence of the disease) and maximization (e.g. catastrophizing the disease or being overly protective). We propose that support providers assess disease state in a simplistic manner, via physical appearances. The MS respondents were also asked to make attributions for the unhelpful support attempts. Although many of these actions seemed harsh and unsettling, recipients interpreted them benignly. These benign attributions seem to indicate that patients feel vulnerable and, hence, are loath to criticize members of their support network.