Abstract
Due to the challenges of globalization, more and more married couples in Malaysia are involved in long-distance relationships. Despite this trend, few studies have documented the experience and impact of long-distance marital relationships on husband or the role of religion in helping Muslim husbands cope with the stresses of separation. Therefore, this study explores the religious beliefs and practices of five Muslim husbands in long-distance marriages. The three main themes that emerged from qualitative analysis are (a) religious belief and commitment to marriage, (b) religious belief as a coping strategy, and (c) religious practices as a coping strategy. This study's findings indicate that specific beliefs and practices are related to how husbands approach their marriages. Findings clearly show that religion continues to be significant in many Muslim marriages, especially in this era of employment mobility. This study also supports previous studies that show positive correlations between salient aspects of faith and family life. This finding highlights the importance of Islamic-based counseling interventions incorporating scientific and revealed knowledge that could support Muslim clients.
Families in today's digital age and globalization era are exposed to more challenges compared to families in previous decades. According to the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development (OECD, 2011), family formation through marriage experienced several changes in terms of its structure. These changes were due to the postponement of family formation, changing trends in fertility, and partnership patterns. Despite the challenges of modernization and the digital age, research found that people still preferred to enter marriage to bind their relationship and love.
Many societies accept marriage as the legitimate means to unite two people for companionship, emotional support, sexual fulfillment, and childbearing. Pursuing marriage is also driven by societal reasons, such as to acquire status in society or conform to societal norms (Kariuki, 2014). Maintaining a healthy and constructive relationship is a crucial part of marriage. Couples must adapt to overcome the challenges in modern marriage and achieve a balance in their life situation. Cultural values and beliefs may determine how individuals perceive the marital relationship. In a collectivist culture, marriage is an important event that unites not only two individuals but also two families. In a collectivist culture, the family of origin still plays a role even after an individual is married. Because collectivist culture emphasizes group integration, usually around the family, the importance of the group's satisfaction takes primacy over an individual's goals. A collectivist culture also emphasizes the structural position of husband and wife, as well as father and mother. The husband is expected to take care of his family and children (Kling, 1995) while the wife's role is to perform the domestic duties of managing a household and caring for and nurturing children.
The common practice for many married couples is to live together. However, for some couples, staying apart or living as a long-distance couple is practiced as a strategy to fulfill their occupational responsibilities and ensure their financial needs are met. In addition to that, changes in values and social norms (Trost, 2006), as well as ease in mobility, transportation, and technological advances (Landesman & Seward, 2013), allows this practice of commuter marriage to be increasingly tolerated in society. According to the Long-distance Relationship Statistics, ∼3.75 million married couples in 2014 were involved in this type of relationship and 2.9% of all American married couples were in long-distance relationships. Observation shows that these couples tend to be middle-class, younger, and better-educated (International Organization for Migration, 2010; Landesman & Seward, 2013).
Long-distance marriage has also become common in a collectivist culture such as Malaysia. The Malaysian Ministry of Women, Family, and Community (2003) revealed that the long-distance family structure became the dominant form compared to the conventional family because more couples live as “weekend families.” In Malaysia's big cities, 25% of the population are involved in long-distance relationships due to career choices and needs (Siaw et al., 2015).
Living apart has forced the married couple to redefine their roles as husbands, fathers, wives, and mothers. Many factors and adaptation issues need to be addressed in a long-distance relationship marriage. Relational maintenance and commitment toward each other play a significant role in sustaining this kind of marriage. Commitment is the core of the relationship and is related to the relationship's quality (Canary & Stafford, 1994; Clements & Swensen, 2000). The couple living apart can experience more difficult times and greater psychological needs. They need to maintain their relationship and the feeling of being attached to their spouse (Van Lange et al., 1997). Effective strategies in handling many issues regarding the nature of the long-distance relationship can benefit more couples, especially in terms of helping the relationship to be rewarding despite difficulties and preventing divorce. Extra effort in terms of adjustment, especially those related to role, rights, and responsibilities need to be done by the couple to protect the relationship (Kariuki, 2014).
Many studies explored the variety of issues among long-distance couples. However, most research was conducted in Western countries utilizing quantitative methodology, focusing mainly on relationship quality and behaviors that can sustain a couple's relationship (Aguila, 2009; Borelli et al., 2014). The primary concern in many past studies was the ultimate effect being apart had on the relationship. Only a few studies documented the experience and impact of long-distance marital relationships on husbands. For example, Kariuki (2014) studied the impact of long-distance marriage on 27 married women and 10 married men in Kenya. The researcher found that long-distance marriages affect couples’ sexual, communication, and emotional relationships. Nastiti and Wismanto (2017) explored marriage and life satisfaction among husbands and wives involved in commuter marriages. The findings indicate that while husbands reported being reasonably happy, the wives tended to report the opposite. The absence of a sexual relationship also led to infidelity. Specifically, the wives were dissatisfied with the marriage. In Malaysia, long-distance marriages were studied by Razak (2016). Razak (2016) used qualitative methods to study the survival journey of seven married women in long-distance marriages and found that communication issues, role conflict, and separation anxiety are challenges experienced by participants.
Reviewing academic literature published in the past 10 years (2010–2020) regarding long-distance marriage in Malaysia indicates there are limited studies on this topic. Research in Malaysia primarily focuses on parenting, family functioning, psychosocial characteristics, and quality of life (e.g., Arshat et al., 2016; Roslan et al., 2013; Tarmuji et al., 2016). For example, a quantitative study conducted by Arshat et al. (2016) found a correlation between parenting stress and family functioning in commuter families among 72 Malay couples. The study revealed that higher parenting stress led to poor family functioning in commuter families. However, using a mixed-method approach, Ortega et al. (2014) explored the impacts of commuting among 226 married men (n = 136) and women (n = 90) working away from their home, specifically outside the Klang Valley area. Although men were more likely than women to perceive the commuting lifestyle as a favorable situation, there were no gender differences reported in how commuting influenced their well-being.
Additionally, those with a positive outlook of the commuting life tended to have positive determination at work, a better general psychosocial profile, and felt less guilty than those with negative perceptions. Meanwhile, Tarmuji et al. (2016) used a quantitative approach to measure the quality of life among dual-career couples in long-distance relationships. Quality of life was measured based on the couples’ emotional and financial stress. The findings of the study indicated that both sources of stress significantly impacted the quality of life. However, the study documented that long-distance marriage nonetheless had a positive impact on a small sample. Distance influences the couples’ quality of life in the long term, including their relationship with children. Another study led by Roslan et al. (2013) demonstrated that commuters with positive psychosocial characteristics experienced fewer emotional problems when dealing with children's education and had better relationships with family members and friends. Although there is a growing body of research on long-distance marriage in Malaysia, not much is known concerning the role of religion in a long-distance marriage, particularly from the husband's point of view. As such, our understanding of the experience and impact of long-distance marital relationships on husbands stands on the edge of a precariously thin base of literature.
Religion and Marriage
Religion was found to contribute to a happier and more satisfying marital relationship (Mahoney et al., 2001). Three important dimensions of religion crucial for a satisfying marriage are spiritual belief, religious practices, and faith communities (Marks & Dollahite, 2001). Religious teachings on marriage such as marital commitment, communication, conflict resolution, and parenting are resources that provide the basic building blocks of a functional marriage. It offers couples the gateway for shared beliefs, values, and practices that encourage togetherness and commitment, which are crucial for marital happiness (Ponzetti, 2003). Additionally, religious activities provide social support when couples meet others during religious gatherings or services. In stressful times, religion can be a helpful source that strengthens a relationship as it provides couples with a sense of purpose and meaning.
Malaysia is a multicultural, multilingual, and multireligious country within the Southeast Asian region. Different groups and communities live side-by-side while maintaining their separate identities (Zaid, 2007). As mentioned previously, Malaysian culture is collectivist. Apart from adopting the collectivist culture, religion also plays an important role in society. According to population estimates issued by the Department of Statistics Malaysia (2020), out of 27.8 million citizens, 69.6% are Bumiputra (Malay and indigenous ethnics), 22.8% are Chinese, and 6.8% are Indian. The remaining 1.0% are citizens from various ethnic groups. Islam is the most prevalent religion in Malaysia, with 61.3% of the total population (Department of Statistics Malaysia, 2010). Even though Islam is considered the Federation's religion as stated in Article 3 of the Malaysian Constitution, other religions can be practiced safely and peacefully (Department of Information Malaysia, 2016).
Islam views marriage as one part of a person's journey through life (Baharudin et al., 2018). However, the ultimate purpose of a Muslim's life is to please Allah. A human being's life is comprised of faith (iman), worship (ibadah), and morality (akhlak) that are interrelated. For a peaceful marriage (sakinah), all the three elements are essential. Marriage is regarded as completing one's faith, and faith is even more important during adversity, knowing that Allah is the one from whom adversity originates. Only Allah can lift it and provide a solution; Muslims should have complete reliance on him (Baharudin et al., 2018). Marriage is regarded as a type of worship, especially when specific roles, rights, and responsibilities are provided as a guide for couples in marriage (Ekram & Beshir, 2003). Finally, morality in marriage refers to the rightful conduct of husband and wife in their married life.
In Islam, the role of a husband is as the leader in the family. He has the responsibility to maintain, protect, and provide for the family financially (Al-Quran, 2:228). This spousal obligation is based on rights and tasks suitable for both genders as complementing each other, even though most of the obligations are mutual or shared (Ekram & Beshir, 2003). Studies show that more men (husbands) are involved in commuting for work purposes (Landesman & Seward, 2013), causing them to have limited time to fulfill their role as leaders and fulfill other responsibilities in the family. However, a wife needs to be independent and adjust to accommodate that role during those times. However, to sustain the sacred marriage's ties between the two partners, Islam provides clear guidance for the couple to ensure they maintain a working marriage despite living apart. It is the responsibility of the husband to provide the basic needs such as food, shelter, and clothing to his wife and children before going on the journey; the time for being away must not be more than a certain length so that the rights of the wife to intimacy and emotional needs can still be fulfilled (Amini, n.d).
No study has been conducted so far in Malaysia on the role of religion and the husbands’ experience in long-distance marriages. As mentioned before, Muslim married couples have specific worldviews and resources that can influence relational processes. As Muslims, they believe that problems or issues can be regarded as a test from Allah (Al-Mateen & Afzal, 2004; Hanley, 2007; Hussain, 2001; Salas & Jadhav, 2004). When faced with challenges and adversity, they commonly use Islamic religious coping strategies, including prayer, reciting the Quran, fasting, and repentance (Hussain, 2001; Weatherhead & Daiches, 2015). Long-distance marriages can be seen as one of the challenges or stressors that Malaysian Muslim married couples may face.
Given this background and dearth of information, the current study's objective is to understand and explore the role of religion in long-distance marriage as experienced by husbands.
Methodology
Research Design
The current study aims to understand the role of religious beliefs and practices and the marital life of Muslim husbands in long-distance relationships. A qualitative design was chosen based on the notion that the design is the most suitable for a discovery-oriented study (Denzin & Lincoln, 2017). Specifically, a phenomenological, qualitative research design was chosen because this study aims to understand husbands’ experiences in long-distance relationships regarding how they make sense of and explain their religious beliefs and practices. According to Merriam and Tisdell (2015), phenomenology focuses on lived experience and how experiencing something is transformed into consciousness. Schram (2003) refers to phenomenology studies as the method of assessing people's conscious world, everyday life, and social reactions. The method is effective for understanding how people make sense of their world and their unique and personal experiences. Phenomenological studies visualize the experiences of individuals to get the essence of their experience (Moustakas, 1994). Therefore, using phenomenology, the study reported here strives to understand the experiences of husbands who live apart from their wives, to understand husbands’ religious beliefs and practices, and to discover their meanings in such a relationship.
Even though this study focuses on the role of religion among Muslim husbands’ experience of long-distance marriage in Malaysia, the findings may still be applicable to other contexts and populations as well. Those who are Muslims, regardless of country of origin, may regard the findings useful as they have similar beliefs, values, and understandings of marriage from the perspective of Islam as a complete religion. Because Islam is a world religion, people that follow other world religions may benefit from the insights on how Islam was used by the husbands to understand long-distance relationship experiences and they used Islam to guide their behavior. A detailed account of the husbands’ experiences based on the social and cultural environments in the setting as described above and would be helpful for readers to make their own judgments (Korstjens & Moser, 2018).
Participants
The sample chosen in this study was a purposive sample comprising married husbands in a long-distance relationship. A purposive sample was used because data collected from this sample is valuable in exploring more in-depth about certain phenomena even though the findings from this sample cannot be generalized (Denzin & Lincoln, 2017). Inclusion in the study required potential participants to be (a) husbands, (b) married for at least one year, (c) living in a long-distance relationship for at least three months due to work and career commitment, and (d) willingness to share their experiences related to their long-distance relationship marriage. The participants were recruited in two ways. An advertisement calling for participation in the research was utilized via social media groups. Another means of recruitment was the snowballing technique through word of mouth. The first few participants interviewed were encouraged to suggest other potential participants allowing for snowball sampling of the study participants. Although researchers managed to contact 10 husbands who meet the criteria, only six were willing to participate.
Based on the specific study purpose, sample sizes can vary significantly in qualitative research (Mason, 2010). As this study is exploratory, a small number of participants was adequate because the study was not intended for generalization purposes. Creswell and Poth (2018) recommend a minimum of five participants in a phenomenology study. Initially, the study identified six participants who volunteered to participate. However, one of them withdrew due to personal reasons. The background of participants is shown in Table 1.
Participants’ Profile.
Data Collection Procedure
Data were collected through in-depth interviews using a semistructured interview protocol to understand the participants’ experiences connected to their faith and marriage. The interviews were conducted in the Malay language, Malaysia's official language and the native language of the research participants. The interviews were audio-taped, transcribed, checked, and rechecked by participants. Participants were interviewed face=to-face from January to August 2017. Each interview lasted ∼1 h. The development of the interview protocol was based on the purpose of the study and literature reviews. Follow-up interviews were conducted until the data reached saturation.
Besides interviews, the husbands were encouraged to keep a journal or diary. They were instructed to express their experiences and feelings about religious beliefs and practices and their connection to their long-distance relationship. Data from journal writing were analyzed and triangulated with the data collected from the interviews.
Data Analysis
Interview data were audio-recorded and transcribed verbatim. Interview transcripts were given to the participants to check for accuracy. Interviews were then coded and analyzed using computer-assisted qualitative data analysis software, ATLAS.ti. Similarly, data from journals were also coded and analyzed using ATLAS.ti. Once data were initially coded, they were sorted into potential themes, and finally, refined based on the relationship between the codes and themes using constant comparison to ensure consistency of relationships.
Thematic analysis, which aims to identify, analyze, and report the pattern within data, was used to generate themes. According to Braun and Clarke (2006), themes are formally interesting or represent essential patterns when they are related to the research question. Data triangulation, member checking, peer review, and audit trials were techniques used to increase data trustworthiness (Creswell & Miller, 2000). In this study, triangulation was done by triangulating the interview data collected from each respondent's reflective journal. Member checking was performed by asking participants about specific themes to confirm data interpretation and its accuracy. Through this process, participants could give feedback and comments (Creswell & Poth, 2018). All the research activities and decisions were reported in a logbook. Additionally, the reflection journals, memos, codes, and analysis were handed to an auditor to perform an audit trail for this study. Peer review for face validity of the results was also carried out by referring the research findings to two experts in qualitative research. This process aims to ensure the accuracy, reliability, credibility, and validity of the study.
Results
Thematic analysis identified three main themes. They were (a) religious belief and commitment to marriage; (b) religious belief as a coping strategy; and (c) religious practices as a coping strategy. The discussion of the themes is as follows:
Theme 1: Religious Belief and Commitment to Marriage
Findings show that all participants talked about their religious belief as Muslims and how that affected their marriage commitment. Two subthemes were found: (a) marriage as involving rights and responsibilities and (b) marriage as a long-term commitment. This can be seen from the following excerpts: Managing the distance after getting married was different [compared to] before marriage. After the marriage, [we] had a mindset to live together, having a normal life [as a married couple] like others. I feel anxious because I cannot help and control family life directly. [Everything] done from far away. Besides, in terms of familial responsibilities, after getting married, I think I had more responsibilities, feel like should help the partner more, especially when we had a daughter made me think that I need to do many things. So, when I cannot do all these things, I felt guilty. (P1) Of course, I want to be a good husband who can fulfill my responsibilities, including “nafkah zahir and batin” (financial and sexual needs). I [also] want to be a good father to my daughter…as taught by Islam. But, after the marriage, we had a tie. Meaning that we had responsibilities [towards each other]. But [when being apart], we were unable to fulfill the responsibilities like showing sufficient love to the partner, providing supports and other needs like other couples. (P3)
In one of the journal's writing, one participant wrote
…tying knot through marriage is a responsibility to God and religion. LDR or not, I have to perform my responsibility, I pray to God to help me commit to my marriage. I believe You (God) are with me. (P5)
In this study, participants shared how they perceive marriage as involving rights and responsibilities guided by the Islamic religion. The participants believed that marriage is a sacred gift from Allah, whereby the husband's role is as the family's leader and to whom the care and well-being of wife and children are entrusted. The participants also believed that marriage should last forever, and marital conflict and challenges should be dealt with appropriately. These beliefs allow them to be committed to their marriages.
Theme 2: Religious Belief as a Coping Strategy
Another theme that emerged is religious belief as a coping strategy. As the participants face marital challenges from a long-distance relationship, religious belief seemed to be critical in helping them cope. This theme comprises the following two subthemes (a) being apart in the long-distance relationship as part of life challenges and (b) intention of the long-distance relationship was supported by religion. Some illustrations from the participants are as follows: Generally, I feel that living apart from the partner was so challenging. It gives challenges in mental, physical, emotional and in everything. It challenges me and my partner, also to our marriage. We never think that we need to face such a thing, but it is happening. Maybe, it was a test to me so that we can be stronger, Insya Allah (With God's will). There were always good things from that was happening. (P1) At the time I cannot do anything, and I need to seek help from others, whereas she was my wife … ish … I feel like … at one point I cannot forgive myself. But I need to accept this as the “takdir” (destiny). Maybe there are something good that Allah had decided for me. (P3) The only thing that made me survive was my intention in long-distance relationship was to study, sincerely to Allah. Because studying was also asked by the religion. (P1) But, when I am alone, after performing prayers, before going to sleep, we feel lost or incomplete [because we are not with our partner] … However, feeling lost is normal but how we manage the feeling. It did not happen because it was intended to leave them or with negative intentions but with a good reason [study/work]. That is we call mujahadah (struggling to achieve good thing). (P4)
In one of the journals, one participant wrote
Oh Allah (God), I am confident that you will help me go through this test. I know it is not easy. Keep me strong, honest, in this relationship. Sometimes I am lost but I know you are always around to help me. (P4)
Participants considered the transition from being together to being separated to be part of life's challenges. Despite needing to adjust and think of ways to maintain their marriage, respondents believed that being apart from one another is a life challenge that taught them to grow and encouraged them to be closer to God and strengthen their relationship. They believe that there is a reason behind what Allah has given them, and they believe that God will help them in facing their challenges.
Theme 3: Religious Practices as a Coping Strategy
The participants shared several religious tips and practices that they used as coping strategies. The practices are prayer and supplications, syukur (being thankful to God), and tawakkal (trusting in God's plan). One participant stated
Since they were not in front of me, I pray harder. We try our best when we were able to do, ask help from family and friends when suitable, the rest Allah will protect [them]. Pray [to Allah] they will be protected from dangerous things. (P1)
… All those difficulties caused me to be more grateful [to Allah], grateful to have a wife that helps a lot, understanding, and I feel I cannot repay her for her sacrifices. (P1)
I am grateful [to Allah] because when being apart, this situation has to be faced. Alhamdulillah [Allah send us] those who gave support helped in handling issues related to life as a couple and, most importantly, they understand and are ready to help. Meaning that when couples live apart and then reunite, they will be more appreciative of one another. (P4)
But, I also worried. I think a lot. With my wife pregnant, living with my children. But I only tawakkal [give my trust to Allah]… Also in providing safety to the family. When I was away, I only tawakkal. Always remind my wife to lock the door, gate and car. (P1)
One participant wrote in his journal about his practice of waking up at night and praying to God: I wake up at night, I pray to Allah (God), help me always in my journey, I am thankful for giving me a good spouse, good relatives, who are always ready to support me even though we are apart. Thank you, God, for protecting me and my family. (P3)
When asked about religious practices that helped the participants cope, several of them mentioned the importance of prayer and supplications, especially as a release from the stress of being far away from their wife and family as a helpful resource in coping. However, they also believed in ensuring their marriage relationship is maintained by setting a specific time to meet with each other in person (reunion), having a planned routine to talk, and communicating using technology such as phone and internet. Through the advancement of good coverage of the internet and phone calls, they can update each other about their daily life and stay connected to their partner and families despite being separated by many miles. In addition, continuous communication can improve the closeness of one another as well as maintaining the relationship through mutual problem solving and expressing care for each other via online media.
Other religious practices such as syukur (being thankful to God) and tawakkal (trusting in God's plan) were also helpful. For example, two participants felt very grateful to Allah that they have supportive extended family members or neighbors that they can rely on during the separation period. In facing the challenges of a long-distance relationship, it is an advantage for the marriage itself if they are granted supportive surroundings such as family and neighbors who endlessly provide helpful assistance and show that they are fully aware of the hardship marriage couples go through. Therefore, in coping with the stress of being apart from their spouse, the participants developed a sense of security by cultivating the habitual act of thanking Allah for the support that they receive from people around them. For the other three research participants, reliance on God (tawakkal) was practiced as they left their family in the hands of Allah as they felt that only Allah can help protect and take care of them while they are away.
Discussion
This study found that husbands in long-distance relationships connect their religious beliefs and practices with their marriage. Many previous studies indicated the connection between religiosity and marital satisfaction, marital commitment, and marital coping. This study also shows how religious beliefs and practices helped couples access resources that can strengthen their marriage relationship and coping strategies in facing life challenges.
The experiences of husbands in long-distance relationships connecting religious beliefs and practices with marriage can be divided into three parts, namely (a) religious belief and commitment to marriage; (b) religious belief as a coping strategy; and (c) religious practices as a coping strategy. This study's findings support Carter and McGoldrick's (1989) flow of stress through the family model. In the model, the family encounters two kinds of stress—developmental stress and situational stress. Thus, the family needs to have the ability to adapt its interactional system to cope and adjust to change and stressful events while maintaining adequate functioning of the family as a system (Gladding, 2015). In the normal family life cycle, the husband and wife must adjust their lives from being single to a couple and realign their relationships with families and friends to include a spouse after marriage. However, when specific circumstances exist, such as taking up postgraduate study, a military deployment, and factors related to work, they may need to adjust their lives further to accommodate the long-distance relationship. Islam views life as a journey and the marital relationship is part of that journey. Being distant is seen as a test, trial, and tribulation that they may have to encounter.
This study's findings also illustrated how religious beliefs and practices helped the husbands develop a sense of purpose and seek spiritual resources to hold on to during challenging times. Religious belief and commitment to marriage are connected to Islamic rules and principles related to marriage. Couples’ relationships are clearly defined in the Al-Quran and the tradition of Islamic teaching practices. Furthermore, Islam provides guidance on the rights and responsibilities of husbands and wives. For example, the concept of the husband as the leader in the family was exemplified in the findings where husbands in long-distance relationships tried to fulfill their roles and responsibilities as husbands and fathers. Additionally, in Islam, marriage is an institution that affirms religious commitments, or in other words, marriage is part of worship (ibadah). Therefore, marriage is not only viewed as a sacred relationship but an eternal one as well.
Husbands used their religious beliefs as a coping strategy when living apart from their wives and families. They believe that the long-distance relationship was part of life challenges resonates with the belief that trials and tribulations are from Allah. Muslims also believe in the concept of qada and qadar, which are fate and destiny. Besides that, having correct intentions was also another subtheme found in this study. The husbands’ intentions to improve their career advancement caused them to have long-distance relationships in their marriage. Husbands coped better with their choice to accept work assignments or advancements that took them away from their spouses by knowing that Islam has always stressed the importance of having correct intentions when doing certain deeds and that Islam promotes life-long learning through the Al-Quran and various Hadiths.
Another coping strategy used by the husbands in a long-distance relationship is a religious practice. The practices mentioned by the husbands in this study include prayer and supplications, gratitude (syukur), and trust in God's plan (tawakkal). Concerning prayer and supplications, this study supports previous research findings that prayer allows individuals to experience strength and healing. Islam highlights the role of prayer and supplications (do’a) in one's life. Prayer is the second element in the five pillars of Islam, and by praying, Muslims preserve their religion. Also, by having gratitude (syukur) and trust in God's plan (tawakkal), husbands in a long-distance relationship could appreciate their life more, especially when they are back together with their wives and families. Gratitude (syukur) is an act of noticing and appreciating life, whether it is the positives or the negatives in the world (Al-Makki, 1997). It can be directed toward God for the favors (nikmat) provided by God. This is seen in fulfilling their wishes or appreciating the practical actions of other people who are perceived as valuable and altruistic (Sharifah Basirah & Che Zarina, 2015). It is regarded as part of faith and, in marital relationships, gratitude (syukur) is vital to maintain the emotional love bank that could save a couple when in conflict. Besides gratitude, putting reliance on God entails Muslim couples exercising patience and calmness to face any trial in life and accept with a whole heart that God has decreed everything. This will consequently make oneself become positive of any shortcomings. This is because, from the Islamic perspective, God will never create something for amusement that has no meaning. This will make both the husband and wife realize that any shortcomings of their marriage have a lesson to ponder, which is also called wisdom (Al-Makki, 1997).
The results of this study provide valuable insights on how husbands in long-distance relationships view the influence of religious faith on their marital relationship and coping strategies to face the challenge of being apart from their wife. However, a limitation in the study is that it follows a qualitative approach and gathers data from only a small sample. Despite this limitation, the study has provided insight into the role of religion as a coping strategy and as a means of strength in the marital dyad. Further studies may consider using different or mixed approaches to support the association between religious beliefs and practices on marriage and coping. It is suggested that future research should evaluate how religious beliefs and practices affect long-term marriages. Future research may also want to explore more deeply the role of specific religious practices. Researchers may also want to study actions and strategies that may contribute to a couple's ability to facing marriage challenges, issues, and problems.
Conclusion
As society and its systems face the challenges of the digital age and globalization, married couples must go through changes. Preventive measures from any threat to the marriage institution can potentially be addressed by religion, in addition to other helping fields. This study's findings can be beneficial for marriage and family practitioners, counselors, psychologists, religious leaders, educators, and other helping professionals who work with families. Some couples may not be ready to expose or share their thoughts and feelings in therapy sessions about how religion becomes one of their coping strategies in facing the challenge of separation. Since it is also unethical for professionals to suggest their clients use religion as a source of coping, it is recommended that professionals share the role of religion as a coping strategy in marriage or couple relationship enhancement programs.
As covered in the discussion section, the findings provide information on how religious beliefs and practices play a role in helping couples adjust to long-distance relationships. It is essential to understand that Muslim married couples have specific worldviews and resources that can influence relational processes (Weatherhead & Daiches, 2015). Therefore, integrating both scientific and revealed knowledge in interventions, especially in Islamic-based counseling or psychospiritual approaches, is crucial to support the Muslim client. Enhancing the quality of marriage and strengthening the family institution through effective services are certainly key to a successful society.
Footnotes
Declaration of Conflicting Interests
The authors declared no potential conflicts of interest with respect to the research, authorship, and/or publication of this article.
Funding
The authors disclosed receipt of the following financial support for the research, authorship, and/or publication of this article: This work was supported by the Malaysian Ministry of Higher Education (grant no. FRGS/1/2016/SS05/USIM/03/1).
