The Black Pill: New Technology and the Male Supremacy of Involuntarily Celibate Men

Incels and the “Manosphere”

The term “incel” was coined in 1997 by Alana (last name withheld), a Canadian lesbian woman who maintained a blog on her experiences with celibacy and sexuality (Taylor 2018). Alana’s blog received awards from the LGBT community and was part of a growing number of websites addressing celibacy. In 2003, Alana became distressed by the increasing negative nature of the blog’s online discussions and shut down her website (Taylor 2018). In addition to Alana’s site, incels argue that 1990s websites on shyness and seduction were formative for the community, while more recent discussion boards on Reddit and 4Chan tied the community to misogyny (Incels.co 2020a). Indeed, Chang’s (2020) analysis of 14 threads on a now-defunct Reddit board for incels details how their ubiquitous use of the term “femoid” (female humanoid or female android) constructs women as objects and facilitates violence and hostility toward women. Accordingly, a community started by a woman for a general experience transitioned into one that is dominated by misogynistic heterosexual men.

As incel communities changed, so did the criteria for being an incel. For instance, Alana’s website defined incels broadly, including people who never dated, those with little dating experience, and those who struggle to establish relationships due to some issue they cannot control (e.g., shyness) (Incels.co 2020a). Likewise, not all celibate men identify as incels, as Terry (2012) demonstrates in an interview-based study of nine men that still desired sex but exercised self-control by practicing celibacy. The site we analyze defines “incel” as anyone who is, “rejected by the members of the sex they are sexually attracted to” (Incels.co 2020b). Despite the openness of their definition of “incel,” the community explicitly excludes women, individuals who deny incel tenets, and members who lose their incel status (Incels.co 2020b). Consequently, incel identity is increasingly oriented to the experiences and perspectives of heterosexual men. Indeed, a deep learning analysis of the now-defunct incels.me site suggests users are heterosexual, male, under the age of 20, and see themselves as ugly (Jaki et al. 2019).

Incels are part of a group of male-oriented websites that are collectively referred to as the “manosphere.” Some manosphere groups have practices that are contrary to those of incel communities, such as pick-up artist sites where men learn seduction tips, and “men go their own way” (MGTOW) communities, wherein men abandon the pursuit of marriage due to overly punitive divorce laws. For example, Van Valkenburgh’s (2018) qualitative analysis of 26 documents central to The Red Pill subreddit demonstrates how men on the forum view women as economic commodities and sexual success results by using strategies from economics and evolutionary psychology. Likewise, Ging’s (2019) 6-month analysis of multiple manosphere sites focusing on gamer culture, MGTOW, men’s rights groups, and pickup artists, suggests manosphere discourse aligns with hybrid masculinity (Bridges and Pascoe 2014), wherein dominant men selectively adopt practices of subordinate groups. Here, Ging (2019) argues that manosphere discourse mixes claims of apparent tolerance for homosexuality with a continued emphasis on gender inequality and male domination.

Despite some differences, manosphere sites are united in their anti-feminist agenda (Nagle 2017) and the belief that feminism has undermined men’s social role, resulting in systemic misandry (prejudice toward men). Indeed, Marwick and Caplan (2016) trace the use of “misandry” across the manosphere since the 1990s, observing that the term is used to build community while discrediting and vilifying feminism. Many manosphere communities also consider themselves to be “red pilled,” which references a scene from The Matrix wherein the protagonist is offered a red pill that will reveal the truth about the world. In the manosphere, accepting the red pill means awakening to the perceived destructive force of feminism (Van Valkenburgh 2018). In addition to red pill language, incels discuss the “black pill,” which means accepting the fact that “it’s over” and “inferior” men have no chance of ever establishing sexual relationships with women. As such, the community is defined by the relationship between heterosexual sex and masculine status.

Society and Emerging Technology

The social impacts of dating apps are a central concern for incels. Research suggests that dating apps have altered dating practices, creating new spaces for sexual and romantic relationships, and considerably expanding an individual’s number of potential partners (Hobbs, Owen, and Gerber 2017). Social scientific and app developers’ in-house research indicates that these apps do introduce or amplify several biases (Gavin, Rees-Evans, and Brosnan 2019). For example, apps have demonstrable racism and racial bias (Mason 2016; Rudder 2009) and privilege physically attractive members (Hobbs, Owen, and Gerber 2017). Apps can also compound misogynistic behavior, as men exhibit aggressive strategies to obtain dates from women and respond with hostility when these strategies are unsuccessful (Shaw 2016). A systematic review (Abramova et al. 2016) further notes that women receive more contacts than men, while men start more conversations and receive fewer replies on dating apps. As we detail below, incels emphasize that apps are problematic because they diminish men’s power in sexual/romantic interactions.

Social media platforms are changing how individuals interact and perceive themselves. For instance, research suggests Instagram^™, a photo-sharing platform, alters how individuals view and criticize their bodies in relation to the attention they do or do not receive (Butkowski, Dixon, and Weeks 2019), while both Facebook^™ and Instagram^™ exacerbate individuals’ pursuit of peer validation and facilitate the release of personal information to impress and attract followers (Yau and Reich 2019). Social media is often tied to bullying, with one study observing 9.76 million cases of bullying on Twitter over a two-year period, which includes both cyberbullying and sharing videos of offline bullying (Bellmore et al. 2015).

Popular discussion boards (e.g., Reddit, 4chan) are sites of online misogyny and antipathy toward feminism (Massanari 2017; Taylor and Jackson 2018; Van Valkenburgh 2018). The claims that men make about women on these sites have online and offline impacts on women. Jane (2018, 2014) demonstrates that women encounter considerable gender-based “cyberhate” and often have little recourse for reducing social media harassment, while Moloney and Love (2019) detail how men engage in gendertrolling and other forms of online oppression. Incels’ participation in and celebration of these misogynistic activities is well-documented, as they harass, degrade, objectify, and encourage violence against women (Chang 2020; Jaki et al. 2019). As we demonstrate below, incels connect these platforms to inceldom.

Masculinity and Online Communities

Connell’s (1995, 2000 with Messerschmidt 2005) masculinity theory is central to many analyses of the manosphere and is likewise informative for our analysis of the incel community. Connell (1995) outlines a masculine order that centers around a dominant form of masculinity, referred to as hegemonic masculinity. Other forms of masculine practice are positioned in relation to hegemonic masculinity, with Connell (1995) identifying men who are not hegemonic but benefit from male dominance (complicit masculinity), men who are subordinated by dominant groups (subordinated masculinity), and men who occupy socially marginalized groups (marginalized masculinity). Connell’s (1995) theory emphasizes change and fluidity in hegemonic actions but maintains that hegemonic masculinity is characterized by the subordination of women (see also Connell and Messerschmidt 2005; Messerschmidt 2019).

Using Connell’s theory to analyze Reddit’s The Red Pill forum, Van Valkenburgh (2018) suggests that men display hegemonic behaviors while exchanging information about how to successfully seduce women. Contrastively, in a discussion of 4Chan.org, Nagle (2016) argues that applying hegemonic masculinity theory to incels and other “betamales” is inaccurate and tautological, as a “great deal” of their activities runs counter to hegemonic descriptions (e.g., enjoying My Little Pony). Ging (2019) introduces additional theoretical complexity, suggesting manosphere discourse exemplifies hybrid masculinity—men’s selective adoption of subordinate practices (Bridges and Pascoe 2014; Messner 2007) as they appear to adapt to emerging gender relations yet still explicitly focus on defeating feminism. Although incels might not consider themselves “alphas” or beneficiaries of male domination (e.g., Nagle 2016), we argue that their apparent “beta” masculinity orients to hegemony, as they suggest new technologies create sexual marketplace distortions that result in the unfair allocation of women among men. Here, incels argue that new technologies reveal and compound gender practices, which drive women toward a select group of attractive men. Incels do not participate in intimate relations with women but their explanations for this issue allow them to hold fast to notions of male supremacy and participate in the denigration, humiliation, and subordination of women. Their focus on technology and dating life also allows them to situate themselves as the victims of emerging social dynamics while justifying their misogyny.

Hypergamy and Dating Apps

Incels argue that dating apps are a driving factor in producing men who are involuntarily celibate. According to this logic, apps like Tinder^™ and Bumble^™ provide women with a large number of men for romantic/sexual partnerships. Incels see women as inherently hypergamous, which means they use these apps to constantly “trade up” and obtain a more desirable mate. Incels claim that dating apps compound hypergamy, unfairly excluding average and below-average men from romantic and sexual partnerships.

Incels suggest that dating apps provide women with a large pool of potential mates (or “matches”). On these apps, users view one another’s profiles, “swiping right” on users they are interested in and “swiping left” on users they are not interested in. Outside of incel forums, many dating app users have shared their match statistics, which anecdotally show that women are more discerning than men. For instance, one male user reports making approximately 27,000 right swipes over a 4-year period, yielding 110 matches, matching with 0.4% of the women he was interested in (Reddit.com 2019a). In contrast, a female user reports that she made approximately 3,700 right swipes over 13 months, resulting in nearly 2,500 matches, matching with 68% of the men she was interested in (Reddit.com 2019b). Incels use these statistics to advance arguments about hypergamy, suggesting that men are lucky to obtain any matches, while any woman can select the best partner from many men.

Incels argue that dating apps facilitate hypergamy because they create an environment wherein women do not select their “looksmatch,” which is an incel term for partnering with someone of comparable attractiveness. Incels claim that women use dating apps to “date up” by selecting men who are more physically attractive than they are. Thus, they argue women of average attractiveness can select men who are extremely attractive, rather than dating a man who is also of average attractiveness. Such mismatched selections can be identified because incels ubiquitously quantify physical attractiveness (see also Van Valkenburgh 2018). Incels rate people from 1 to 10, where 1 is very unattractive and 10 is very attractive. Incels suggest that dating apps make it possible for a woman that is “five” to partner with men who are “nines and tens.” As one user states:

I was often attracted to ugly girls around my looksmatch but every one of them rejected me because they could find better using tinder and shit like that…. I was called “ugly” even by girls WAY MORE ugly than me. Like 2/10 obese roasties.

While incels focus primarily on hypergamy relative to physical attractiveness, they also argue that dating apps compound status-based hypergamy. Incels claim that women who they deem to be average or below average attractiveness are able to partner with men who are both attractive and socially successful:

Nowadays, foids want good looks [and] good income [and a good] personality. And they are getting it, make no mistake about it. Because of Tinder and hypergamy. Foids prefer to share a Chad rather [then] settle with anything less.

In this section, we demonstrated how incels perceive dating apps as revealing and compounding women’s innate hypergamy. Incels situate themselves as hapless victims in this scenario, seeing themselves as average or below average men who are excluded from romantic life due to a confluence of external forces, which leaves the role of their prolific and caustic misogyny unexamined. Here, incels victimhood is firmly tied to their ideas that they are owed sex and entitled to women’s bodies. While incels connect heterosexual sex to masculine status (Connell 1995; Pascoe 2011; Taylor and Jackson 2018), they argue that it is apps and women that deny them this status. Incels denigrate women for rejecting them while depicting women as simplistically and hedonistically pursuing the most physically desirable men. While apps are a driving factor in the inceldom, it is women that receive hate and anger.

Chads and Tinder

In tandem with increasing hypergamy, incels argue that dating apps provide women with access to “Chads,” an incel-term used to describe the most attractive men. In general, they define Chads as white, tall, and muscular, with attractive faces and well-defined jawlines, with actor Chris Hemsworth often cited as an archetypical Chad. Incels suggest that dating apps provide women with sexual/romantic access to a near limitless supply of Chads. They argue Chads use dating apps to pursue sexual relationships with many women simultaneously, leaving most men unpartnered.

Incels ubiquitously rate men’s attractiveness. They identify Chads as the most attractive type of men, followed by normies (or “cucks,” “betamales,” or “numales”), and then incels. While Chads are white, incels identify a subset of men of color as highly desirable, using the terms “Tyrone,” “Chang,” “Chaddam,” to refer to attractive Black, Asian, and Arabic men, respectively. Incels rank all these desirable men above both themselves and normies. In contrast to Witt’s (2020) discussion of incel hostility toward Chads, incels here intimately detail the attractiveness of such men, reflecting on their musculature, height, and jaw-definition, with one user describing a Chad by stating, “his bones radiate so much energy and lust towards women. It’s like he’s a God.” To incels, Chads both command and deserve attention from women.

Incels unfavorably compare their own bodies to those of Chads. While Chad is muscular, tall, and filled with energy, incels perceive themselves as suffering from a lengthy list of physical shortcomings, including thin wrists, small stature, weak jaws, large noses, poor musculature, and misaligned eyes. In contrast to previous studies (Van Valkenburgh 2018), incels are not attempting to become Chads, as part of the “black pill” is accepting their perceived subordinate status and realizing they will never ascend the masculine hierarchy. Incels further suggests that the physical disparities between themselves and Chads drive their sexual isolation:

5-6 s [average looking men] can only date with very low-tier women and that’s because these women are mostly too ugly to even get pumped and dumped [i.e., have a one-night stand] by Chads…. So, as a 5, even if you have 10/10 personality, if you have another deficiency [women] will eliminate you without even looking at your personality.

According to incels, dating apps magnify these masculine disparities, creating a sexual and romantic context wherein incels are unable to compete with Chads, who are transparently and vastly superior. Chads use dating apps to maintain sexual relationships with multiple women and, as one user notes, “Chads [can] basically break all the rules of [pick up artists] in terms of approaching women and it doesn’t matter.” That is, incels argue that Chads are so desirable that they can establish sexual/romantic relationships with women even if they ostensibly violate social norms and dating rules. To demonstrate this, users share the result of a “Tinder experiment,” wherein a fake profile combined the picture of a handsome white man with a biography listing three convictions for sexual assault, an attraction toward minors, and derogatory language toward women. In what incels referred to as an “atomic black pill,” the fake profile successfully matched 79% of the time (162 matches for 204 right swipes). While this “experiment” serves to humiliate women, incels view it as proof that new dating technologies overwhelmingly favor Chads.

Incels acknowledge that apps broaden dating pools, but they suggest this has the counterintuitive outcome of exacerbating inceldom. For incels, the current dating context means that average men, and particularly unattractive incels, have very low odds of finding a sexual partner:

Every girl wants Chad. And chads are like 1/10,000 [of the men in the world]. Each of us need to hit on 10,000 girls before we get a match. You can literally post the secret to creating a nuclear bomb, how to be invisible, or how to make a million dollars in a day, but roasties would rather watch Chad’s face [appear on their social media feeds] then any of that.

Once again, incels’ discourse connects gender practices, new technology, and the inceldom. In these comments, women compulsively pursue Chads, while Chads rightfully dominate this “winner-take-all” sexual marketplace. Once again, incels’ anger and claims of victimhood are also tied to their sense of entitlement to women’s bodies. While incels direct vitriol at women, Chads receive admiration. It is not Chads’ dominance of women or other men that is the issue, but incels’ perception that, as men, they have been unfairly denied sexual access to women. Incels want to participate in this system, not overturn it.

Betamales and Instagram

Via social media, incels argue that “betamales” fawn over women, providing them with continuous praise that disrupts a woman’s accurate assessment of her own desirability. Incels suggest that women exploit betamales, while betamale attention leads women to overestimate their physical appeal and believe they “deserve” a Chad as a long-term partner.

Cucks, betamales, and numales are men that incels perceive as subordinate to Chads. While these men can have sexual and romantic relationships, they are always at risk of losing their partner to a more desirable man (e.g., a Chad), and there is a constant threat that their partner is having an affair. As such, incels posit that betamales and numales are often quite literally cuckolds (“cucks”) to Chads. This dynamic is summarized in the oft-repeated slogan “alpha fux, beta bux,” (see also Van Valkenburgh 2018) that describes how betamales provide financial support to women while they are having sexual affairs with more desirable men.

According to incels, betamales are a driving force behind the extensive attention women receive on social media, with hundreds, thousands, or millions of betamales fawning over individual social media accounts. Incels refer to this behavior as “orbiting,” as betamales maintain close proximity to women in the hope that their constant expression of interest and/or financial gifts will increase their chances of establishing a sexual/romantic relationship. In this analogy, the woman is the center of attention around which the betamale “orbits” as he tries to demonstrate his value as a partner and escalate the relationship.

For incels, this orbiting is also pointless. As one user observes, “orbit, orbit and orbit until Chad comes along. Then what are you going to do? Ninety percent of men that orbit fail to get any sex from the female they were orbiting.” Incels argue betamales can never compete with Chads, so orbiting is ultimately a failing strategy. Indeed, incels refer to orbiting as a “trap” that both incels and non-incels can fall into, falsely believing that a woman will reciprocate interest if they provide enough attention. As orbiters are perceived to have been manipulated by women, it is behavior that is starkly critiqued:

She just wants you to give her attention and be an emotional tampon. You have been friendzoned, you aren’t even considered a sexual being in her mind. Why you continue to orbit this whore after she’s made it obvious that she has no interest in you is beyond me.

For incels, a crucial part of social media orbiting is that it distorts women’s self-perception of their “sexual marketplace value.” All women, regardless of their attractiveness (which, for incels, is known and quantifiable), receive constant adoration and believe that they are exceptionally desirable. As one user complains, “thirsty [men desperate for sexual contact] pathetic betas” are “responsible for the current state of affairs. At this rate, the pussy price is exponentially growing to infinity.” For incels, sexual relationships are explicitly transactional, with “thirsty betas” artificially increasing the resources women command to engage in sex, which distorts the sexual market. Specifically, betamales follow women on social media and provide them with a steady stream of comments stating how attractive they are. As one user summarizes:

Easy answer [why there are more incels], smartphones. Instant access to every Chad in a 500-mile radius and being showered with admiration and attention 24/7. Every woman is a celebrity with Instagram…Basically, a 2/10 foid gets much more sexual interest in her than a 10/10 did from the 1990s.

Incels claim that social media creates an environment wherein women perceive themselves to be highly desirable and they consequently pursue the most attractive men, believing such men to be their rightful “looksmatch.” Incels suggest that women will select casual sex or being single over dating a beta or an incel:

There are actually high beauty standards for men [from women], and women choose to just go on Tinder, or whatever, to have one-night stands [with Chads]. Or stay single. Because they don’t want an average or below average looking guy.

As with dating apps, incels situate social media as revealing and compounding gender practices that produce incels. Chads rightfully dominate, while “pathetic thirsty orbiters” harm all men’s interests by providing women with attention that is not bound to a sexual quid pro quo. For incels, it is not a problem that women are objects, the problem is that they have become overpriced. Once again, this formulation buttresses incels’ essentialist ideas while situating themselves as hapless victims of changing social relations.