This is an exploratory, descriptive study of relationship redefinition. Using symbolic interaction theory, this paper examines the contours of post-dating relationships, asking the following questions: 1) how do people orient themselves to one another after a dating reltaionship ends?; and, 2) what is the power dynamic between one's social network and his or her post-dating relationship? Using a snowball sample (N = 30), interview data are analyzed as narratives about the respondents' construction of post-dating relationships. Until recently, research has focused on postdivorce relationships and has characterized these as maladaptive (Weiss 1975; Spanier and Casto 1979; Berman 1985). This study joins recent research which suggests that relationships between former spouses or lovers may satisfy legitimate needs such as friendship, shared history, and extended social networks (Metts, Cupach and Bejlovec 1989; Aydintug 1995).
Get full access to this article
View all access options for this article.
References
1.
AhronsC.R.WallishL.S.1989. “The Relationship Between Former Spouses.” In Intimate Relationships: Development, Dynamics, and Deterioration edited by DuckS.PelmanD.Newbury Park, CA: Sage.
2.
AydintugC.D.1995. “Former Spouse Interactions: Normative Guidelines and Actual Behavior.”Journal of Divorce and Remarriage22:147–161.
3.
BarthR.J.KinderB.N.1988. “A Theoretical Analysis of Sex Differences in Same-Sex Friendships.”Sex Roles19:349–363.
4.
BedardM.E.1992. Breaking With Tradition: Diversity, Conflict, and Change in Contemporary American Families. New York: General Hall, Inc..
5.
BemS. L.1981. “Gender Schema Theory: A Cognitive Account of Sex Typing.”Psychological Review88:354–364.
BowlbyJ.1969. Attachment and Loss: Vol.1 Attachment. New York: Basic Books.
8.
BowlbyJ.1973. Attachment and Loss: Vol.2 Separation. New York: Basic Books.
9.
CaldwellM.A.PeplauL.A.1982. “Sex Differences in Same Sex Friendship,”Sex Roles8:721–732.
10.
CupachW. R.1992. “Dialectical Processes in the Disengagement of Personal Relationships.” In OrbuchT.L. (ed.), Close Relationship Loss: Theoretical Approaches. Springer-Verlag: New York Inc..
11.
DindiaK.CanaryD.J.1993. “Definitions and Theoretical Perspectives on Maintaining Relationships.”Journal of Social and Personal Relationships10:163–173.
12.
GoodeW.J.1956. After Divorce. Glencoe, IL: Free Press.
13.
KleinR.MilardoR.M.1993. “Third-Party Influence on the Management of Personal Relationships.” In Social Context and Relationships edited by DuckS.Newbury Park, California: Sage Publications.
14.
La GaipaJ. J.1982. “Rules and Rituals in Disengaging from Relationships.” In Personal Relationships Vol. 4: Dissolving Personal Relationships edited by DuckS.New York: Academic Press Inc..
15.
LauerR.H.HandelW.H.1977. The Theory and Application of Symbolic Interactionism. Boston: Houghton-Mifflin.
16.
Lipmen-BlumenJ.1976. “Toward a Homosocial Theory of Sex Roles: An Explanation of the Sex Segregation of Social Institutions.” In Women and the Work-Place edited by BlaxallM.M.ReaganB.Chicago: University of Chicago Press.
17.
MasheterC.1990. “Postdivorce Relationships Between Ex-Spouses: A Literature Review.”Journal of Divorce and Remarriage53:103–110.
18.
MasheterC.HarrisL.M.1986. “From Divorce to Friendship: A Study in Dialectic Relationship Development.”Journal of Social and Personal Relations3:177–189.
19.
MeadM.1970. “Anomalies in American Postdivorce Relationships.” In Divorce and After edited by BohannanP.Garden City: Doubleday.
20.
MettsS.CupachW.R.BejlovecR.A.1989. “‘I Love You Too Much to Ever Start Liking You’: Redefining Romantic Relationships.”Journal of Social and Personal Relationships6:259–274.
21.
MonsourM.HarrisB.KurzweilN.BeardC.1994. “Challenges Confronting Cross-Sex Friendships: “Much Ado About Nothing?.”Sex Roles31:55–77.
22.
MontgomeryB. M.1993. “Relationship Maintenance Versus Relationship Change: A Dialectical Dilemma.”Journal of Social and Personal Relationships10:205–223.
23.
O'MearaD.1989. “Cross-Sex Friendships: Four Basic Challenges of an Ignored Relationship.”Sex Roles21:525–543.
24.
PaineR.1974. “An Exploratory Analysis in ‘Middle Class' Culture.” In The Compact Newfoundland Social and Economic Papers No.3, Institute of Social and Economic Research edited by LeytonE.Toronto: University of Toronto Press.
25.
PleckJ.H.1975. “Man to Man: Is Brotherhood Possible?” In Old Family/New Family edited by Glazer-MalbinN.New York: D. Van Nostrand.
26.
PogrebinL.1987. Among Friends. New York: McGraw-Hill.
27.
RawlinsW.K.1982. “Cross-Sex Friends and the Communicative Management of Sex-Role Expectations.”Communication Quarterly30:343–352.
28.
RubinL.1985. Just Friends. Just Friends. New York: Harper and Row.
29.
SchlenkerB.R.1984. “Identities, Identifications, and Relationships.” In Communication, Intimacy, and Close Relationships edited by DerlegaV.J.New York: Academic Press.
30.
SimmelGeorg. 1908/1959. “The Problem of Sociology.” In Essays in Sociology, Philosophy, and Aesthetics edited by WolffK.New York: Harper Torchbooks.
31.
VaughanD.1986. Uncoupling: How Relationships Come Apart. New York: Random Books.
32.
WallerW.1951. The Family: A Dynamic Interpretation. New York: Dryden. (Revised by Reuben Hill).
33.
WestonK.1991. Families We Choose. New York: Columbia University Press.
