Abstract
What Is a Peaceful Death?
For most, this involves a death free from pain and suffering. It can also mean time with friends and family. It can include making amends, saying goodbye, and often becoming closer with each other through the sadness of death paired with the review of a life well lived.
Death is not inherently painful, but sometimes there is the fear or the reality of pain and suffering. This can be especially true when the causes of distress, either emotional or physical, are unknown. However, once there is an understanding of what causes pain and suffering we can move more fully toward realizing the hope of a peaceful death.
What is Pain and Suffering?
Pain is what we may perceive in response to physical or emotional injury. It can come from tissue trauma, stretch, or swelling or from damage to nerves. In addition, there can be pain of the mind and spirit. When these physical and emotional pains are more than we can cope with, when we seem to lose our sense of self, this is suffering. Suffering can involve fear, anger, heartache, loneliness, loss, and a sense of the seeming unfairness of death. For many, the burden of unfinished business can also be overwhelming.
Despite the potential for pain and suffering, it is important to know that an increase in pain is not a sign that death is near.
Can Pain and Suffering Be Eased?
Yes. It is important to determine the types of pain present and work toward the appropriate treatment. Often this requires a degree of trial and error. Ultimately, pills and shots cannot treat all kinds of pain and suffering. Some physical, emotional, or spiritual pains require input and intervention of family and friends, and the assistance of multiple members of a hospice or palliative care team.
Often this involves simple but extraordinary moments of sharing. As written by Dr. Ira Byock, 1 patients and families can heal through the expression of forgiveness and thanks with phrases such as “Please forgive me,” “I forgive you,” “Thank you,” and “I love you.” In addition, being present, even without words can be vital to healing ourselves and those we love.
Footnotes
The information and recommendations appearing on this page are appropriate in most instances, but are not a substitute for medical diagnosis. For specific information concerning your personal situation or medical condition, JPM suggests that you consult your physician. This page may be photocopied noncommercially by physicians and other health care professionals to share with patients. Any other print or online reproduction is subject to approval by the publisher: Mary Ann Liebert, Inc. To purchase bulk reprints, call 914-740-2100.